by HerBard
[e-mail unavailable]
Copyright © by HerBard, 1998
Disclaimer: You know the deal. Xena, Gabrielle, Argo, Cyrene, and so on belong to the nice people at MCA/Universal. Although some of the characters are mine. No copyright infringement is intended. But I do own stock in Seagrams so they kind of belong to me!
Warnings: Mild violence, (after all we are talking Xena), lots of same- gender sex going on. So if you're not old enough, GET OUT! If you are old enough, enjoy. Be kind this is my very first attempt at fan-fiction so don't tear me to shreds.
The sun was setting as the cries of the Amazon Queen could be heard throughout the village. It had been a long hard day for the Queen and her beloved Warrior.
"Push Gabrielle, push!" came the strong voice from behind.
"You want me to push, then make me, Warrior!" came the terse reply.
Xena didn't know how much more her woman could take. Twelve hours in labor and the baby was no closer to coming. Her woman. It was so nice to be able to think and say it and not feel guilt or sorrow. Gabrielle looked up through pain filled eyes and saw the look of concern written on her warrior's face. Gabrielle remembered that same look the day she was told she was pregnant.
It had only been a month since Perdicus died that Gabrielle started feeling ill. She began waking up in the morning sick and unable to eat. After the fourth morning it dawned on Xena what was wrong. At first she thought it was the stress of losing Perdicus. How could she have been so stupid! She had felt that with Solan, sick in the morning, and then it would pass. This couldn't be happening! Xena had just gotten her beloved Gabrielle back and now she was going to lose her to a baby. Xena chided herself for being angry at an innocent child, but during the last few weeks they had fallen back into the comfortable routine they shared before Callisto and Perdicus nearly broke them apart.
"Ugh, when will I get better?"
"In about nine months Gabrielle."
"What?"
Green eyes met blue and locked together in a loving gaze.
"Gabrielle, I think you're pregnant."
"Wrong, wrong, wrong!" Gabrielle yelled between heaves. "I can't be, we only- ah, I mean, once, it was only once."
"Beginners luck," came the droll response.
Gabrielle looked at Xena and promptly passed out cold.
After that the fight started. Xena wanted to send Gabrielle home to her parents to wait out the pregnancy, but Gabrielle wanted none of it. She was determined to stay on the road with Xena, insisting on no more separations.
"I am not going to let you give birth to our child on the road," Xena quipped.
The Warrior realized what she had just said, and prayed that Gabrielle didn't hear the slip of the words, "our child." Gabrielle's spirits soared. Xena thought of the child within her as theirs. She wished it were. The thought of raising a child with Xena stirred a longing in Gabrielle she didn't think she could hide. It would be a second chance for Xena and she'd be a wonderful mother. Their child would be showered with all the love and attention the two could give.
"Gabrielle, I mean it, you are not giving birth to your child on the road."
"Of course not silly, she will be born among her Amazon sisters."
Xena smiled at the bard. She should have known Gabrielle wouldn't willingly endanger an unborn child. The woman had more sense than Xena sometimes gave her credit for.
"Xena, when I feel the time is right to come off the road, I'll let you know. You have my word."
"When you feel the time is right? Gabrielle, be reasonable."
"Xena, I'm not going to discuss this any further."
Xena looked into Gabrielle's eyes and knew the girl meant business.
"Okay, but the first hint of trouble and I'm taking you to Ephiny."
"I'd expect no less from my Warrior."
A shiver went down Xena's spine when Gabrielle called her "her Warrior." If only it could be. If only Gabrielle felt the same. Xena knew that Gabrielle had loved Perdicus, after all she had married him and now she was carrying his child. The child he would never see. Unseen to the two women, Artemis was watching the exchange. Gabrielle was Artemis' favorite. Her loving nature, kindness and loyalty was what her Amazons needed, and Artemis was going to make sure that any child born to Gabrielle would have the same traits as her parents. The lone figure disappeared as quickly as it came.
Later that evening Gabrielle was happily writing in her scrolls while Xena sat close by sharpening her sword. A favorite pastime when something was bothering her. Careful not to let Gabrielle see her catching glances, the Warrior kept staring at her beloved. She knew every line, curve and mark on the young woman's face. A face that had filled out and matured.
Gabrielle knew Xena stared at her. It had become a nightly ritual for the bard. Xena would sharpen her sword and steal quick glances while Gabrielle pretended to work on her scrolls.
She laughed to herself, "Big dumb Warrior doesn't think I know how she feels."
The young bard decided to put forth a plan of action to get Xena to admit her feelings. Her slip tonight about "our child" confirmed what Gabrielle had suspected for a long time. Xena did love her, more than just in a best friend sort of way. If only she had admitted her feelings before she married Perdicus, he would still be alive, and she wouldn't be pregnant. She couldn't blame Xena entirely.
"It's not like I told Xena how I felt either," the bard thought. "As soon as I'm feeling better, Operation Xena goes into effect. The great Warrior Princess better watch out because she doesn't know what's about to hit her."
Gabrielle glanced at Xena and smiled. Xena looked over at Gabrielle and saw the look in her eyes, and a warning went up in her head.
"She's up to something. I'd better be on guard. She has that look, and I know I'm going to be on the receiving end."
"Good night Xena," Gabrielle said as she settled down.
"Goodnight. Gabrielle are you okay?"
"Of course silly, why wouldn't I be?"
"I thought you might be feeling a little overwhelmed about-" Xena couldn't make herself say the word pregnant, "- everything."
"I'm okay."
Gabrielle rolled over and went to sleep, hoping tomorrow she'd feel better.
Xena sat and watched Gabrielle sleep. She loved these times when she could just stare at the bard, safe that her love and desire couldn't be seen.
"I'm in deep," Xena thought. "Everything about this woman excites me."
The next five weeks the mornings were the same. Gabrielle awoke, threw up and then sat down to eat a hearty breakfast. Even without being pregnant Gabrielle had a voracious appetite, and now with two to feed it was worse. Xena felt as if she was spending all her time feeding her bard.
"Xena how long is this morning sickness going to last?" Gabrielle asked between mouthfuls of stew.
Xena barked back, "How should I know?"
The Warrior was immediately sorry she had been cross. She could see the hurt in Gabrielle's eyes but couldn't bring herself to apologize.
"Sorry Xena, I only wondered if you felt that way when you were pregnant with Solan."
"I don't remember."
Xena knew she had hurt her friend with her words but suddenly it was all beginning to sink in. Perdicus had done to Gabrielle what Xena could only dream about. They had created a child out of their love for one another. Even if she and Gabrielle were partners, even Xena the great Warrior Princess couldn't give Gabrielle a baby. Part of her hated Perdicus for what he had done to her Gabrielle. Xena had always dreamed of being Gabrielle's first. But again it was only wishful thinking on her part. If Gabrielle knew how she felt about her she would turn and run away in disgust. Xena had lost Gabrielle once and she would never lose her again. Even if that meant keeping her feelings to herself.
The two women ate dinner in silence. Xena because she was brooding and Gabrielle because she was making her plans. Tonight would be the night. If Xena got angry and told her to leave, even though it would hurt her to no end, the pain of not being able to express her love for Xena was slowly killing her. Every time Xena touched her it sent shivers down her spine, and made her yearn for more physical contact. How come she never felt this way when Perdicus touched her? Gabrielle knew that Xena was her soul mate.
Xena sat sharpening her sword once again. Gabrielle wondered how there could be anything left to sharpen. Ever since they had found out Gabrielle was pregnant Xena had gone into overdrive sharpening her sword. She hoped that after tonight Xena wouldn't feel the need to sharpen it so often.
"Xena?"
"Yeah?"
"Were you scared when you were pregnant with Solan?"
Gabrielle could see Xena's eyes soften at the thought of her young son.
"Are you scared Gabrielle?"
"Yes."
"Do you want to talk about it?"
That was all the invitation Gabrielle needed. She picked up her bedroll and moved it next to Xena's. Xena put her arm around Gabrielle's shoulder and nuzzled her face in the bard's hair. She breathed in the scent of the young girls clean hair and body. This all felt so right, Gabrielle in her arms.
Gabrielle could feel the warrior start to relax. Another sign that she felt safe and comfortable with her. She would never do anything to make Xena feel otherwise.
After a few minutes of silence Xena finally asked, "What are you most afraid of?"
"I'm afraid of being alone when the baby is born, afraid you won't be there to hold me and tell me it's going to be okay. I'm afraid of the pain."
Xena felt as if her heart would break at Gabrielle's words.
"Oh Gabrielle, I'll always be here. I'll hold you. I promise you won't have this baby alone. We're in it together."
With a twinkle in her eye, Gabrielle asked Xena to show her how she'd hold her. Xena moved around behind Gabrielle and sitting on her knees, tenderly placed the bard's head in her lap. Xena cupped Gabrielle's chin with one hand and slowly caressed her face with the other. How good it felt to hold the woman she loved. Gabrielle thought to herself, "It's now or never." She took Xena's hand in hers and slid it over her left breast.
"Xena, can you feel how fast my heart is beating?"
"Yeah," came the husky reply.
"Its beating fast for the love I feel for you."
"Gabrielle," came the silky voice.
"Shh, let me finish or I never will." Gabrielle stood and pulled Xena up in front of her and stared intently into blue eyes. "Xena, you are my life, my inspiration, my pillar of strength. You're my reason for getting up in the morning and going to bed at night. I love you so much. I hope you're not angry with me, but I couldn't keep it to myself any longer. If you want me to leave, I will."
Xena felt her heart soar like a bird.
"You love me."
Xena didn't mean for the remark to sound so harsh. Gabrielle tried to pull away but Xena held her back with her strong arms.
"Oh Gabrielle, you don't know how I've wanted to hear those words."
"You have? I hoped I was right."
"Gabrielle, I love you so much it hurts. And you had the courage to speak of your feelings. You don't know how much I admire that about you, your ability to say how you feel."
"Xena, I've loved you for so long I just couldn't keep it hidden any longer. Especially now with the baby coming."
"Gabrielle, I know how hard it must be not having Perdicus."
"No Xena, you're wrong. Yes, I miss him, but I was never in love with him. Maybe if we had been more open with our feelings I never would have married him. But we can't live in the past, it's over and done with. Just know this Xena. I love you and only you."
"You the one I want by my side when my, when our child is born."
"I love you too my bard."
"Xena, I want to make love to you, with you, for you."
"Gabrielle, I think we should wait until the baby is born. I don't want to hurt you."
"Xena you could never hurt me. Besides, once the baby is born we'll never have time. It'll be feedings and changings and-"
Xena cut off Gabrielle's words with a passionate kiss. The Warrior moaned when much to her surprise Gabrielle's tongue entered her mouth. Xena pulled away from Gabrielle, causing the bard to look up at Xena with concern.
"Xena, did I do something wrong?"
Realizing what she had just done, Xena replied, "No love I just need to see your face, I need to be sure this is what you really want."
"Xena, shut up and make love to me."
With one arm wrapped around the bard, Xena swept Gabrielle off her feet and onto the bedroll. The two women quickly removed their clothes and just sat looking at one another trying to get comfortable with this new facet to their relationship. Xena lay down and drew the bard into her arms and began to place soft delicate kisses on her lips. Lips that were so soft and yet firm. Lips that she had spent hours looking at and wondering how they would feel to kiss. And now here she was, touching, feeling and caressing them. Xena was determined to make this moment last. They had an entire lifetime ahead of them.
Xena woke early. Her heart felt lighter than it had in years. Gabrielle had given herself completely to Xena. The only obstacle was the baby. Xena just didn't see how they could travel on the road with a small infant in tow. Gabrielle had woken and was watching Xena as she prepared the morning fire. She could see the look of concern on her lover's face.
"Xena, it will all work out."
Xena turned around and came to the bard, taking her in her arms.
"Mmh, that feels good. You feel good," murmured Gabrielle.
"Gabrielle we have to be practical. The road is no place to bring up a baby. There are too many risks. You both will be better off with the Amazons. Besides, I'll visit all the time."
"Yeah, where have I heard that before? Look Xena. There are risks living among the Amazons. Sickness, raids, me," Gabrielle joked, trying to lighten the mood.
"Ephiny can keep you safe."
"No one can keep me as safe as my Warrior Princess. Xena, I am not going to have our daughter grow up and not know you."
"Gabrielle, how do you know it's a girl?"
"I just do."
"I'm not your child's parent. As much as I may want to be, I'm not."
"Xena, you once told me we can't choose who we are born to, but we can choose who makes up our family. I guess you didn't mean it."
"Of course I did. I do."
Xena looked into Gabrielle's determined eyes. Not wanting to upset the girl any further, she decided to let it drop until after the baby was born.
"Okay, we'll wait and see what happens after the baby is born."
"That was a good sign," thought Gabrielle. At least she didn't outright say no. "While we're waiting Xena, kiss me."
Not needing a second invitation Xena lavished Gabrielle with passionate kisses.
"Come on Gabrielle, push!"
Gritting her teeth and glaring at Xena, Gabrielle screamed, "You want this baby so badly, you push!"
Xena smiled at her lover. Gabrielle always the one for a quick comeback, even in the worst of times. "Been there, done that, it's your turn."
"Humph! It's a good thing Perdicus is dead or I'd kill him," thought Gabrielle.
Another wave of pain shot through the bard making her scream out. Beads of perspiration mixed with tears ran down her normally placid face, making her look puffy and swollen. She still looked beautiful to her devoted warrior.
"Xena, please make the pain go away! I can't take any more!"
Xena had never been comfortable with the birthing process. She had seen too many things go wrong. Too many babies born breach, and no way to help mother or child. Xena pushed the thought from her mind. She wouldn't let anything happen to her bard.
"Gabrielle, I'm going to use pressure points to ease the pain. It will only give you relief for a little while."
Gabrielle nodded, and shut her eyes in preparation. Xena wished she could take the pain for her love. Damn Perdicus for putting her through this. "If he wasn't already dead, I'd kill him," thought Xena. Strong hands carefully applied the right amount of pressure. Slowly Gabrielle relaxed and let sleep overtake her. The pain soon forgotten.
"Gabrielle, open your eyes," came the melodic voice.
It was all Gabrielle could do to open her eyes, but once she did everything had changed. Gone were Xena and her sister Amazons. She knew she should be scared but there was something familiar about the voice.
"Gabrielle, I want you to listen to me. Do you understand?"
"Yes."
A cloaked figure appeared before the young bard. A bright light surrounding the figure kept Gabrielle from seeing who it was. Suddenly she felt such peace and calm. The last few hours gone from her mind.
"You don't fear me, good. Do you know who I am?"
Gabrielle suddenly realized who was behind the cloak. "Artemis," the bard replied weakly.
"Yes my child."
"Have I died?"
"No Gabrielle, you have a long life ahead of you. I've come about your child."
"No, please don't let anything happen to my baby!"
"Calm yourself child. Nothing is going to happen to your baby. But there is something you need to know about her. Perdicus is not the father. Xena is."
"I don't understand."
"Gabrielle, you and Xena have the kind of love that knows no boundaries. The love you share most people can only wish for. That is why I granted you your wish."
"My wish?"
"Yes, don't you remember? On your wedding night when Perdicus told you he wanted a lot of children, you wished that Xena could give you children, not Perdicus."
"Yes, I remember. But how?"
"Gabrielle it's impossible to explain in terms that you would understand. Know this, this child is as much a part of Xena as she is you."
"Why did you do this?"
"You have done so much for my Amazons. Because of you, my sisters will live on for generations to come. This was my way of thanking you."
"Will our child be given free will?"
"Of course. This child is free to do with her life as she desires. But, if she wanted to rule the Amazons, I'd have no objections. Close your eyes now and rest. It's almost time."
Gabrielle shut her eyes and waited for the moment, the moment when their child, hers and Xena's would be born.
"Come on Gabrielle, almost! One more push. You can do it love."
Solari was standing by with a warm blanket while Ephiny paced. She never did well during childbirth, especially when it involved the Queen.
One more push produced a crying dark haired, blue-eyed baby girl. Xena
quickly placed the child in the waiting blanket without even looking at her. Solari placed the baby on top of an exhausted but happy Gabrielle.
The tears flowed freely. She felt an instant bond with her daughter. "Xena, isn't she beautiful?"
Xena bent down and kissed the top of her beloved's head.
"I'll be back love." In a flash Xena was out the door. She wasn't needed now. There were plenty of people to tend to Gabrielle, she'd only be in the way.
Ephiny stepped forward and peered at the bundle, then looked at Solari and smiled. "Solari," Ephiny commanded, "Send out the message, let everyone know our Queen has given birth to a daughter."
Solari nodded and left the hut, feeling happy and giddy like a little kid.
"Ephiny, where did Xena go?"
Ephiny shifted, she didn't want to tell Gabrielle what she suspected.
"Ephiny?"
"She'll be back. If I know Xena, she doesn't want anyone to see her emotions at a time like this. Gabrielle, you need your rest, your labor was long and you need to heal."
Gabrielle shut her eyes and was soon fast asleep. Ephiny looked at both mother and child and wondered what lay ahead for them. She knew Xena well enough to know the warrior was doubting her ability to keep Gabrielle and the baby safe. It was times like this she wanted to pound her to a pulp, but knew she didn't stand a chance against her friend. But she also knew Xena well enough to know she'd do the right thing, even if it took a while for her to come around.
Xena ran for what seemed like hours. Finally exhaustion overtook her forcing her to sit down against an old tree trunk. She let her mind wander to the last few days. Gabrielle had been so excited about the baby and Xena had shown only a mild interest. She knew she shouldn't be but she was jealous that the baby was a product of Gabrielle's short marriage. She was ashamed of herself for such feelings. After all, Gabrielle had ended up hers. And now they had a child to care for.
Before leaving the hut Xena had caught a glimpse of the child. She had Gabrielle's nose. A nose the warrior loved to look at. No! She was starting to let her defenses down. She couldn't let the child get to her. A baby would need lots of love and attention. Xena never knew how to act around children. She still had a hard time showing affection in public. Besides, how could a child love her after all the horrible things she'd done. And the baby would be an easy target for her enemies. If word got out her heart belonged to a child every enemy in the known world would be after them.
With a heavy heart, Xena decided that Gabrielle would stay behind and raise the child among the Amazons. She hated the thought of leaving Gabrielle behind but it was the only solution. She"d visit often. Xena had traveled alone before, and while she didn't want to, she'd do it again. The evening dew was beginning to settle in. A shiver went up Xena's back. She"d better get back and see how Gabrielle was doing.
Xena finally returned and found a sleeping bard. Next to the bed in a small crib was the new bundle. She stole a glance at the sleeping child. Dark hair the color of hers. For a brief moment Xena let herself feel that the child belonged to her and Gabrielle. A moan from the bard broke the spell. In a second Xena was by her side. She stroked her face. Green eyes opened and peered into blue.
"Hi, Xena," came the groggy voice. Gabrielle shifted in bed and winced.
"Hi yourself. Are you in pain?"
"No just sore. Isn't she beautiful?"
"Yeah," was all Xena could manage.
"Hey, don't I get a kiss?"
Xena bent down and kissed the bard. A small moan came from the exhausted woman.
"Xena, we need to talk, about the baby. There is something you need to know."
"Rest, we'll talk when you're feeling better."
Gabrielle nodded and shut her eyes. She was soon back asleep. Hours later Xena woke with a start. "What is that noise? It sound like a Tiger. Where was Gabrielle, it had Gabrielle!" Xena now fully alert looked and saw Gabrielle gently lift the crying child out of the crib.
"Shh, Mom's here. I know you're hungry."
Xena's heart was yanked out of her chest as she watched her love handle the tiny infant. The gentleness and softness with which she spoke to the child brought a tear to Xena. Oh how she loved this woman. Gabrielle brought the baby over to the bed, sat down and made herself comfortable against the pillow. Still exhausted she opened the front of her tunic and let the baby suckle. This was more than Xena could take, the sight of Gabrielle with the child made her lose her breath. She had to get out, take a walk, go run, practice her drills, anything but she couldn't stay and watch this loving moment between mother and daughter. Xena got up to leave.
"Oh no you don't Warrior. I know what you're up to and you're going to
stay here whether you like it or not. You made a promise not too long ago about holding me and never letting go."
Xena sat back down on the bed and took the two in her arms. She wanted to reach out and touch the child but couldn't make herself. "No use becoming
attached, when I'll be gone so much of her life," she thought sadly.
"Xena, I'd like to name her Lycea, if that's okay with you."
Xena felt tears sting her eyes. "Oh Gabrielle, I don't know what to say."
"Yes is a good place to start."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes."
Xena kissed the top of Gabrielle's head. She wished this moment would last forever. Gabrielle nuzzled her head in Xena's shoulder.
Xena awoke with a heavy weight against her chest. She looked down. Gabrielle and the child had fallen back to sleep against her chest. This felt so right. These two were her family. "No! Push it back Warrior," Xena screamed to herself.
Gabrielle could feel Xena stiffen. She knew her lover was grappling with self doubt about her ability to be a good parent. Gabrielle wanted to talk to Xena about what Artemis had told her but knew that she needed to come around on her own, and not be influenced by the gods.
Two weeks passed and Xena still hadn't touched or picked up the baby. The wall that Gabrielle had so carefully broken down was back up. Gabrielle decided tonight was the night she was going to put a whole in that wall.
Gabrielle had just gotten back into bed from another feeding when Lycea began to cry. The bard had an idea.
"Xena, could you please pick her up?" the bard pleaded.
Panic shot through the great Warrior. "Gabrielle, I think she'd rather have her mother pick her up."
"Xena, please, I'm just so tired."
Xena who couldn't say no to Gabrielle, got up and went to the crying child. Carefully she picked up the wiggling bundle.
"She won"t stop."
"Put your finger in her mouth."
Xena put her finger in Lycea's mouth and she immediately relaxed and stopped crying. Gabrielle wanted to cry at the sight of her big strong warrior holding the small infant. The look on Xena's face told Gabrielle that the wall did indeed have a small crack in it. She wouldn't push Xena, but tonight was a start. She knew the bond was now forming and with careful planning, Xena would be actively parenting.
Xena carefully put the baby back down in her crib. She didn't want to hurt the baby, or break anything. She let out a deep breath when the child was safely back down. Gabrielle held open her arms and Xena went into them and felt herself relax in her lover's arms. They hadn't been intimate in months. Xena kept insisting they wait until Gabrielle completely healed. For now they were content to hold one another.
The time had come for Gabrielle to decide upon Godparents. There really hadn't been a choice. Ephiny and Solari were the chosen ones. Both women were thrilled to be given the honor of Godparent to the future Queen of the Amazons. The ceremony would be in three days. That didn't give Gabrielle a lot of time to break down the rest of Xena's wall. She needed a plan and her overactive imagination had no problem conjuring up one. If Xena found out what she had planned she'd kill her. She needed help. And who better to trust than the Godmothers to her daughter. She trusted those two with her life and that of her child's.
After dinner Gabrielle sought out the two women. She found them sitting by the food hut laughing. Gabrielle saw the way they looked at one another and smiled. "Hmmh," once she got her troubles straightened out she'd work on bringing them together. They definitely made a nice couple. Gabrielle took the two women into her confidence and went to bed that night ready to do battle.
Xena had spent the better part of the day drilling with Eponin. She needed to work our her tension and Eponin was always ready to take on Xena. A nice soak in the baths and she'd feel pretty good. She went back to the hut to pick up a clean tunic and found the hut empty. All of Gabrielle's things were gone, as well as the small crib. Xena ran out of the hut in a rage.
"Gabrielle did it again, she's left me and taken our child!"
Xena ran to Ephiny's hut only to be told the Co-Queen had left for a retreat earlier in the day. No one had seen Gabrielle or the baby since lunch. Alomin one of Gabrielle's cooks, did remember an Amazon woman from another tribe stopping to ask directions to a nearby village. Gabrielle had only been too happy to offer assistance. Xena followed Gabrielle's footsteps to where the Amazon's wagon had been. And there they stopped.
Xena whistled for Argo, who ran to her mistress, ready to do whatever was asked of her. She"d done it again, driven away those she loved the most. When was she going to learn? She only hoped it wasn't too late.
The Inn was crowded with people. Gabrielle took a seat in the far corner facing out so she could see everyone in the room. A trick she had learned from Xena. She quickly scanned the noisy, dimly lit room and noticed two cloaked figures sitting in the opposite corner. They looked harmless. She continued on and noticed a young couple very much in love holding hands. Definitely no threat. The barmaid came along with Gabrielle's cider.
"You're baby is beautiful, how old is she?"
"Thank you, she's two weeks old."
"That's pretty young to travel."
"It couldn't be helped."
"If you need anything my name is Helena."
"Thank you Helena. My name is Gabrielle, and this is my daughter Lycea."
Helena extended her hand to Gabrielle. "It's nice to meet you Gabrielle."
The barmaid stepped away to resume her duties. Gabrielle started to take a sip of her drink when a big burly unshaven man came over to the table. Gabrielle gagged at the odor he brought with him. "Guess he hasn't seen water in the last decade."
"What's a pretty little thing like you doing out with such a little one? Does your husband know where you are?" The unwelcome stranger leered at Gabrielle.
"I don't have a husband, I'm a widow." Gabrielle bowed her head slightly. The glean in his eyes made the bard shudder. She had her staff and knew she could easily take him out, but what would she do with Lycea? Gabrielle tried to get Helena's attention, but she had her back turned taking an order.
"Isn't that a coincidence, I'm single too." The man kept inching closer to Gabrielle.
Before Gabrielle could react a flash of fury came into the Inn and pulled up in front of the man. He scanned the new prospect from head to toe and grinned.
"Ah, two for the price of one. My lucky day."
Xena snarled, "You leave my woman and my kid alone, you got that?"
"Or else what?"
Xena took the man by the scruff of the neck and tightened her grip, causing him to gasp for breath. "Or else you'll get the long end of my hand up your nose. Now get out of here." Xena released the man who ran out of the Inn with his tail between his legs. Xena felt her legs go weak and quickly sat down next to Gabrielle.
"Are you both all right?"
"Now we are."
Without thinking Xena took the baby from Gabrielle and examined her from head to toe. Lycea cooed happily in her new mother's arms.
"Come on Gabrielle we need to talk. I'll get us a room for the night."
Xena still holding the baby led Gabrielle away but not before turning around and looking directly at the two cloaked figures.
"You can go home ladies," came the stern voice.
Ephiny and Solari slowly removed their hoods and smiled at Xena. Xena started to leave but not before Ephiny caught her arm and whispered, "Xena, I hope you're here to do the right thing."
Xena glared at the Queen. "Leave me with mine."
Xena turned and left the two women. "Warriors," laughed Ephiny.
"Hey what's that supposed to mean?" queried Solari. "I'm a warrior."
Ephiny tweaked Solari's nose. "And a special one at that."
Moments later the trio entered the sparse room. A bed, chair and table made up its contents. Gabrielle put the crib down next to the bed. Xena was still holding Lycea, not quite ready to give up the treasure she had just found.
"Gabrielle?"
Gabrielle knew she was in trouble when Xena used that low questioning tone with her.
"Yes?"
"You have some explaining to do and I'd better like what I hear."
Gabrielle just stared at her love and then broke into a wide grin.
"What possessed you to take Lycea and run off? You two could have been hurt."
"That's why Ephiny and Solari were here, you know just in case."
"Gabrielle, they wouldn't have been a match if somebody had really wanted you or the baby."
Gabrielle's eyes clouded over. "Xena, we had to do something to get your attention. You won"t hold Lycea, you won"t touch her. She needs to know you love her. You and I haven"t been close in months. You've put up that wall of yours and won"t let us in. Xena I love you so much. I know you're afraid that something will happen while we"re on the road but hey something could happen among the Amazons. I'm willing to take that chance. What kind of life do you think I'd have without you by my side?"
"Oh Gabrielle, I am so sorry, I never meant to hurt you, or shut you out. I need you too, more than you'll ever know."
Xena sat down on the bed and opened her arms to Gabrielle. The bard sat down and let her woman hold her. Xena had both of her girls in her arms, right where they belong. She now felt complete for the first time in her life.
Gabrielle gently began to stroke Xena's arm. "Are you ready to talk about it?
Xena paused and took a deep breathe, slowly letting it out.
"I've been so scared and jealous about her."
"Scared I can understand, but jealous?"
"I know I shouldn't say this Gabrielle but I was jealous that Perdicus gave you what I could only dream of, a baby."
"What scared you?"
"I was scared to love her, scared that one day she'd see me for who I really am, an evil warlord."
"What you were. You're no longer that person. Go on love."
"Scared that someone will harm her because of my past. I couldn't bare what that would to do you, to us."
"Xena, I love you with all of my being and my knowing about your past has never been issue. Of course she'll need to be told, but she'll love you because you are her mother. Who you are now, will shape who she becomes. And yes there is risk, but I'd rather take my chances with you by my side, than to go it alone."
Xena smiled at her Gabrielle. She always knew the right thing to say to make even the worst of situations seem right.
"Still jealous?"
Xena looked down at the small infant, and suddenly felt deep love that threatened to overwhelm her.
"No, it's strange, but suddenly I do feel as though she's mine."
"She is."
"Well yes because we'll raise her together."
"No, because she was created out of the love we have for one another."
It was Gabrielle's turn to take a deep breath and let it out. She knew that Xena wasn't fond of the gods and wasn't sure how she'd react to the news that one had helped create their daughter.
"What is it my love?"
"Xena, what I am going to tell you may seem a little impossible, but please hear me out before you go crazy. Promise?"
"Promise."
Xena didn't like the sound of this, but whatever it was they"d get through it together like they had done numerous other times when problems had arisen.
"When I was in labor for so long and you put the pinch on me, Artemis came to me in a vision."
"Artemis? What did she want?"
"She granted me my wish."
"What wish was that?"
"On my wedding night when Perdicus told me he wanted lots of children, I wished that you could give them to me not him. Artemis heard my plea and made it so." Gabrielle waited for Xena to blow up but all she saw was tenderness.
"She's ours? Really ours?"
Gabrielle nodded. "She has your eyes."
Tears streamed down Xena's face. She could hardly believe that her wildest dream had come true. Xena suddenly tensed.
"What's wrong?"
"Gabrielle, our child will do with her life as she chooses. Artemis will not force her to do anything she doesn't want."
"Xena, Artemis has given our child free will. She can do whatever she wishes with her life."
Xena settled back down. Lycea gurgled and cooed at her mother'. That night the two women lay in bed watching their beautiful daughter sleep. And when Gabrielle would get up for her feedings Xena was right there to hold the two in her arms.
"My mother will be so surprised," Xena laughed.
"Yours, what about mine? Especially when I tell them she's a princess on both sides of her family."
Gabrielle got up and put Lycea back in her crib. She was asleep in seconds.
"C"mere Bard."
Gabrielle slid back into bed to waiting arms. Xena took one of her long fingers and slowly ran it down Gabrielle's cheek. The mere touch of her finger sent a shiver down the bards back.
"Xena, I've missed you."
"Missed you too," came the husky reply.
Xena pulled the bard on top of her. The two stayed like that until moments later when Gabrielle sat up and looked into blue eyes and smiled.
"Xena, make love to me."
"No Gabrielle, it's too soon for that, you're still healing."
Gabrielle tried not to show the disappointment in her face but she knew Xena was right. For now they would have to be content with just holding one another.
The following morning Xena awoke early and slipped out of bed. She picked up her daughter and sat down on the chair. Gabrielle feigned sleep to watch the two.
"Lycea my little love, so much has happened to us in such a short period of time. Your mother and I have finally found each other, and now you've come along. I promise you my darling little girl that I will protect you with my life. You'll grow up to be happy and loved."
Xena began to sing softly to the baby. Gabrielle wiped a tear from her eye.
"I know you're awake Gabrielle."
Gabrielle opened her eyes and smiled at her love. "Xena, I love you."
"I love you too my bard." Xena kissed the top of Lycea's head. "You too my little princess."
"Mmh, I could stay in bed all day. How about it Xena?"
"Sorry love. Tomorrow is Lycea's birthing ceremony. The entire Amazon nation will revolt if we don't go back. Not to mention what Ephiny and Solari will do."
"Which reminds me. Have you noticed how Ephiny and Solari look at each
other?"
"No!"
"They belong together!"
"Gabrielle."
"What?" the bard asked innocently.
The birthing ceremony was a beautiful affair. Hundreds came from all over neighboring Amazon villages to honor their Queen and her child. True to form, Lycea cried all through the ceremony until Xena took her from Gabrielle and softly hummed. Lycea loved to be sung to and settled into her mothers arms. Ephiny and Solari proudly stood up with Gabrielle and Xena and took their sacred vows as Lycea's Second Mothers. Revin, the Amazon religious leader conducted the ceremony as she had done for the last 50 years.
"Queen Ephiny and Warrior Solari you have just accepted Lycea as your own. This is not to be taken lightly. This child is as much yours as if you had given birth to her. You are required by Amazon law to give your life for the this child, if she is ever in danger. Do you agree to this?"
"Yes," the two women answered in unison.
"Queen Gabrielle and Xena of Amphipolis, you agree that these two women are to be the chosen mothers for your daughter in the event you are unable to?"
"Yes," agreed Gabrielle.
Xena trying to lighten the mood, hesitated and stared straight at Ephiny. Ephiny thought that Xena had changed her mind but twinkling blue eyes gave her away.
"Xena?" asked Ephiny.
Xena broke into a wide grin. "Yes, I agree."
"I'll get you," Ephiny whispered.
"In your dreams Eph," the warrior whispered back.
"Gabrielle and Xena have both written words they would like to say to their daughter."
Gabrielle turned and faced her daughter. She took her little hand into her hers and lightly caressed the tiny fingers.
"Lycea, I never knew the bond between mother and child could be as strong as it is. I look at you and I am completely humbled. Know this, little one, I love you with all that I am. I vow to keep you safe, happy and loved."
Xena looked at her little daughter. She felt so overwhelmed she didn't know if she could get the words out of her throat. Gabrielle could feel her warrior's nervousness.
"Deep breath, love."
Xena took a deep breath and slowly let it out. "Lycea, my little princess. My past is a legacy I regret having to leave you. I know that there may come a day when you won"t accept me or my past. But know that no matter what your feelings for me may be, I will always love you and be there for you. I promise to keep you safe from harm."
The trio turned and faced Revin. "On behalf of the Amazon Nation, I welcome you Lycea, daughter of Gabrielle and Xena into the sisterhood of Amazons. May your life be long, happy and full of riches."
Revin smeared ashes on Lycea cheeks. "Welcome child."
Xena and Gabrielle each kissed their daughter and then turned to one another and kissed for long minutes until Ephiny broke them apart.
"Hey you two this isn't a joining ceremony." Ephiny took Lycea from Xena.
Xena looked at Gabrielle and smiled. "Not yet."
"Xena?" asked Gabrielle.
Before Xena could answer crowds of women began to descend offering their congratulations and to get a closer look at their future Queen. Neither Gabrielle or Xena had let on that it was Lycea's decision as to whether or not she wanted to rule. For now they were happy with life as it was.
After the ceremony a great party was held in honor of Lycea. Gabrielle and Xena received so many gifts they didn't know what to do with them all. After a candlemark of noise and confusion Lycea began to get fussy.
"Gabrielle, I'm going to take Lycea back to the hut. She needs a nap."
"Good, I think I'll find Ephiny and Solari."
Xena could see the twinkle in Gabrielle's eyes. "Gabrielle, be good."
"Me?" came the innocent question.
Gabrielle reached up and kissed Xena, then Lycea. "Love you."
"Love you too."
Gabrielle turned and left. Hoping to find Ephiny and Solari. Xena laughed to herself. She knew her friends didn't stand a chance now that Gabrielle had decided to bring them together.
Gabrielle went in search of the two and found them coming out of the food hut. She fell in step with her friends.
"Gabrielle, it was a lovely ceremony."
"Yes it was," added Solari.
Solari couldn't keep her eyes off of Ephiny. Gabrielle wondered is she and Xena acted that way before they came together. "It's now or never," thought the bard.
"Solari, how would you feel about going out on a blind date?"
"A blind date?"
Out of the corner of her eye Gabrielle could see Ephiny tense. "A good sign," she mused.
"Yes, one of my Royal Guards has expressed an interest in you. She"d like to take you out this evening if you're available."
"Which one?" Ephiny demanded. Ephiny wanted to tear apart the Guard who dared go after her
woman.
"Now Eph, if I gave away her name it wouldn't be a blind date, now would it?"
"No, I guess not."
Solari looked at Ephiny wishing she had the courage to tell the Co-Queen how she felt. She couldn't just throw herself at Ephiny. What if she didn't feel the same way? She didn't want to lose the deep friendship the two shared.
"Sounds like fun," Solari squeaked. "Thanks."
"Well that's the least I can do for one of the mothers of my child. I'll go set it up and let you know what time."
Gabrielle walked off leaving two very tense Amazons glaring at one another.
"Have fun tonight, Solari." Ephiny turned on her heels and walked off.
Gabrielle entered her hut to find a sleeping warrior holding a sleeping infant. These were the moments she knew she would forever cherish. She went to her saddlebag and removed a cloak. Xena opened an eye and watched her love, wondering what she was up to.
"A cloak?"
Gabrielle spun around and faced Xena. "It's cold?"
"Uh huh. I'm going to shut my eyes and forget I saw you."
"Xena!"
With that Xena shut her eyes and snuggled Lycea closer to her.
"You better rest now warrior for later tonight you'll be quite busy. The Queen needs your services."
"I'll have to check my schedule, I might have plans."
Gabrielle walked over to the bed and quickly kissed Xena hard on the lips.
"Still think you have plans?"
Xena grinned at Gabrielle. "Maybe."
"Hmm," the bard snorted.
Gabrielle left the hut and arrived at Solari's hut to help her get ready for her date. Solari was all nerved up and couldn't keep still. All she kept talking about was Ephiny.
"Solari, would you relax?"
"I can't, I'm nervous. Gabrielle, did you see Ephiny?"
Gabrielle looked at the warrior and grinned.
"What?" asked Solari.
"Solari, why don't you tell Ephiny how you feel about her?"
Solari blushed as she met Gabrielle's sincere eyes. "Is it that obvious?"
"She's all you've spoken of since I arrived."
The young warrior felt that a huge weight was being lifted off her shoulders. "Oh Gabrielle, I love her so much. It scares me sometimes when I'm with her because I have all I can do to keep my hands off of her."
"Tell her."
"I can't. What if she doesn't feel the same way?"
"Solari, I see how the two of you look at each. Believe me, I know when two people belong together. Xena and I wasted to much time by not sharing our feelings. Don't make the same mistake we did."
"You're right. If it's okay with you, I think I'd like to cancel my blind date. All of a sudden I feel as if I'd be cheating on Ephiny."
Gabrielle winked and smiled at Solari. "Don't worry, I'm your date tonight."
Panic swept across the young woman's face. All she could think about was what Xena would do to her if she knew Gabrielle wanted to be her date.
"W-hat about Xena?" Solari stammered.
"She's taking care of the baby."
"Gabrielle, it's not that I don't find you attractive because I do it's just-"
Gabrielle laughed. "Solari, I'm not interested in you that way, I'm your blind date to help you snare Ephiny."
"Huh?"
Ephiny, with a raging temper and jealous streak she never knew she had, was pacing back and forth in her hut. The Queen knew Solari was on her way to her blind date and there was nothing she could do about it. Solari practically jumped at the chance when Gabrielle asked her. When she saw Gabrielle she was going to tell her to mind her own business. She couldn't stand the thought of someone else touching her Solari. Just then she heard giggling voices from outside. She knew Solari's voice, but the other she couldn't make out. Ephiny hurried to the window and looked out to see Solari and an unknown woman walking arm and arm, laughing their heads off. That was more than the Co-Queen could take. She tore from the hut at break neck speed and pulled up in front of the cuddling couple.
"Ephiny."
"Solari, what do you think you are doing?" came the curt question.
"I'm out on my date." Solari could barely keep from laughing at the Queen. If she could see the rage in her face she'd be laughing too.
Ephiny pushed her way between Solari and the unknown date. She faced the younger woman and put her hands on Solari's shoulders. "Solari, I love you," came the tender words.
"You do?"
"Yes for a very long time."
"Ephiny, I love you too, more than you know." Solari felt a wave of relief pass over her at the prospect of being with her love.
Ephiny took Solari's right hand in her left and brought it up to her mouth and lightly kissed each finger. A cough brought the two women to their senses. They weren't alone. Ephiny turned to face the cloaked figure.
"Who are you?" demanded the Queen.
Hands raised and lowered the cloak, revealing a very happy Co-Queen.
"Gabrielle? What's going on here?"
"I'm Solari's date."
Ephiny could feel her anger boiling. Gabrielle had the hottest warrior in the known world and now she wanted another one.
"I can't believe you're cheating on Xena," Ephiny spat.
"Ephiny, don't be so thick." Gabrielle laughed and winked at Solari. "I'll let Solari explain to you." With that Gabrielle turned and headed towards her hut and into the waiting arms of her lover. "Dumb warriors."
"I heard that Gabrielle. Solari, what just happened here?"
Solari drew Ephiny into her arms and held her close. "I'll tell you love, later, much later." Solari and Ephiny's lips met and kissed one another for long minutes until each had to part to catch her breath.
"Solari, in my hut now," came the husky request.
"Whatever you say my darling."
The two walked off together arm in arm.
Gabrielle entered the hut pleased that her plan had gone off without a hitch. Xena was on the bed holding Lycea. The warrior could see the pleased look on her lover's face.
"I take it things went well."
"Don't think we'll see Ephiny and Solari for days."
Gabrielle settled on the bed next to Xena. The warrior handed Gabrielle their daughter and waited for her to settle into her waiting arms. Finding just the right spot Gabrielle relaxed against her woman and let the baby feed.
"Somebody's a hungry girl," Gabrielle laughed.
"Like her mother."
Gabrielle punched Xena in the arm.
"Hey!"
Gabrielle glanced over at their saddlebags and noticed a leather bag among the articles.
"Xena, what's that?"
"I made a baby carrier to hook onto Argo's saddle so Lycea can safely travel."
"You do have many skills."
"Yup."
Gabrielle was absently stroking Xena's arm. The two women were content to lay there and hold their daughter. Xena knew she would never tire of watching her baby daughter. This was a special gift she was never going to let anything happen to.
"Xena, do you still want to visit your mother?"
"Yes. What about yours?"
"I don't think they're quite ready for this yet."
"The baby or me?"
"Xena, I'm too happy right now, I don't want any confrontations. We'll visit them, but not right now. Is that okay?"
"Okay, whenever you're ready."
"Xena, I think I need a kiss. No, I know I do."
Xena cupped Gabrielle's chin in her hand and gently pulled her mouth to the bard. They kissed one another long into the night.
A month had passed and Gabrielle could sense Xena was getting anxious to be back on the road again. Six week-old Lycea was filling out, and was a happy baby, rarely fussy unless hunger or dirty pants called. Gabrielle felt she was finally ready to begin her journey with her parents.
Gabrielle found Xena in the stable sharpening her sword. The sight of the warrior still took Gabrielle's breath away.
Xena didn't have to look up to know that Gabrielle had entered. She had an uncanny knack for being able to sense who was around her. Was it scent, hearing? She didn't know, only that it had never let her down.
"Where's Lycea?"
"With Ephiny and Solari."
"Didn't know they could tear themselves away from each other for that long."
Gabrielle laughed and sat down on a bale of hay next to Xena. The warrior stopped sharpening her sword and looked at Gabrielle with smiling blue eyes.
"What?" asked the bard.
"You really don't have any idea how much I love you, do you?"
"Probably about as much as I love you."
With a twinkle in her blue eyes Xena shot back, "that little huh?"
True to form Gabrielle punched Xena in the arm.
"Hey, I'm getting a permanent mark there."
"Then behave."
"Make me."
"I would but someone might come in."
"Like that would ever stop you, Gabrielle."
Gabrielle leaned over and lowered the sword to the floor and took Xena's hands in hers.
"Gabrielle, I mean it," came the stern voice.
"I know, love. I want to talk to you."
"Okay."
"It's time."
"For?"
"For us to be back out on the road. I know you're getting restless, and to be truthful so am I."
"I thought you liked being here."
"I do, but I like the privacy we have out on the open road."
Gabrielle was right she didn't think she could stand another day here, but would stay if the bard wasn't ready to travel. "Are you sure?"
"Bags are all packed, you just need to saddle Argo."
"What about Ephiny and Solari?"
"You want them to come too Xena?"
Xena retaliated by punching Garielle lightly in the arm.
"Well then I guess there isn't anything left for me to do."
"Yes there is. My lips, they have this problem, they need to feel- "
Before Gabrielle could finish soft lips were kissing her mouth.
"Yup, that did that trick. Thanks Xena."
"Oh any time."
After heart felt good-byes to Ephiny and Solari the three were on their way. Lycea was secure in her new carrier being carried proudly by Argo, who knew she was holding very special cargo. Xena felt alive at being back out in the open. She didn't realize just how cooped up she had been feeling. The wind hitting her face and the sun beating down were the perfect match. It didn't take long for the women to fall into their old routine. Gabrielle began telling Xena her latest story, and Xena happily listened. They went on this way for a few candlemarks until Xena abruptly stopped walking, making Gabrielle plow into her back.
"Hey, what gives?"
"Gabrielle, ready your staff."
Xena was removing her sword from the sheath as four burly men came at them.
"Argo, retreat," Xena yelled.
Argo ran off leaving the two women to do battle.
"Lycea!" Gabrielle screamed.
"She's fine, Gabrielle. Concentrate!"
One of the men came at Gabrielle with a knife. She raised her staff ready to take him on.
"You'll fetch a fair price in market."
"Not if I can help it," retorted the determined bard.
The man, large, with a shaved head and missing teeth, lunged at Gabrielle. She managed to step aside and strike him in the back of the leg. He stumbled but because of his size stayed upright. He spun around and made another lunge, this time coming within an inch of Gabrielle's neck. Still feeling the effects of her long labor, Gabrielle was tiring quickly. She felt her muscles weaken as she continued to go one on one with the man.
Xena had taken down the first two right away, but the third was a definite match to her skills. He was about her height, and was having no problem keeping up with her parries. Out of the corner of her eye, Xena could see Gabrielle was tiring. She needed to put a stop to this right now!
"Yyiiiiiiiiiiiiii," came the deafening yell.
Xena lunged at the man and with one move, thrust her sword into his stomach. He dropped to the ground, dead before he hit. Just as Gabrielle's attacker was going to stab her, Xena threw her chakram, hitting the man in the neck. He too was down for the count.
Xena rushed to her lover's side and caught her just as her legs gave out.
"I've got you, love," Xena softly spoke as she lowered Gabrielle to the ground.
"Keep throwing myself at you, huh?" came the weak remark.
"Wouldn't have it any other way."
"Where's Lycea? Where's our baby?"
Xena brushed the hair out of Gabrielle's face. "Ssh, she's fine." Xena whistled and in a moment Argo came trotting up to the duo. With Xena's help Gabrielle got up, went to the mare and peered in the carrier. Lycea was still asleep unaware of what had almost befallen her parents.
"Xena, you trained Argo to retreat if we"re ever in danger."
"She's also been trained to go to Ephiny and Solari."
Gabrielle put her arm around Xena's waist and drew her close.
"I knew you'd take care of us. See it all worked out."
"Yeah." Xena was still shaking inside from the near miss. She"d met her greatest fear and won. Would she be able to the next time?
The three walked on for a candlemark and later and came to a nice spot by a river. Deciding to stop for the night, Xena and Gabrielle set up camp. While Xena was catching dinner, Gabrielle started the fire they would need to cook. Xena came back with two rabbits she had already skinned. Gabrielle boiled water and had vegetables cooking when Xena dumped the cut up rabbit into the mixture.
After dinner Gabrielle cleaned up while Xena and Lycea set up the bedrolls and crib. Gabrielle laughed as she watched Xena. She had Lycea in one arm and was using her free arm to position the crib. Lycea began to cry, wanting to be fed, right on time just like her mother. Gabrielle came over and took her from Xena, who sat down and leaned against a tree for support so Gabrielle and Lycea could take their usual spot in her arms. Xena began stroking Lycea's little head as she watched her tiny daughter eat.
"Xena?"
"Hmm?"
"You're not sorry that we have Lycea are you, I mean after what happened today?"
"Never Gabrielle. I've never been happier in my life than I am right now. I have the two best girls in the whole known world." Xena paused, trying to find the right words for what she was about to say. "Gabrielle, when Lycea is old enough, she will need to be taught to defend herself. If she does become a target for my enemies, she must be able to protect herself."
"Agreed."
"Just like that? No argument?"
"Not a one. I know you'll do what is right. After all, we have plenty of time."
Xena kissed the top of Gabrielle's head. "I wonder what she'll call us?"
Gabrielle laughed. "Xena she's only 6 weeks old. I don't think she'll be talking for a while."
"If she takes after you in the least, she'll be talking our heads off before we know it."
Xena held out her arm for the slap she knew she'd get but instead she received a kiss.
"Xena I'm all healed."
"Are you sure? I wouldn't want to hurt you."
"Xena you could never hurt me."
Gabrielle placed Lycea down in her crib, then fell into waiting arms. Xena rolled Gabrielle over so she was straddling her bard. She began to plant kisses all over Gabrielle's neck. The bard began moaning as the kisses sent electric shock waves all through her body.
"Oh yes, Xena, it's been too long. Take me now. I need you. I need to feel you."
Just as Xena began to unlace Gabrielle's top, Lycea began to scream. Xena looked at Gabrielle and laughed.
"Welcome to motherhood, Gabrielle."
The rest of the way to Amphipolis was clear. Lycea traveled back and forth between her two mothers. Xena didn't tire from her little load and secretly hated giving her up even to Gabrielle. Gabrielle slowed her pace to watch the two people she loved most in the world. It still overwhelmed her to watch the great Warrior Princess with the baby. Their baby. She could scarcely believe that this beautiful child belonged to them. She knew she would spend the rest of her days thanking Artemis for all she had done.
As the family reached the outskirts of Amphipolis, Gabrielle could feel Xena tense up. She put a reassuring arm around the Warriors waist and drew her close. Gabrielle could feel the taut muscles begin to relax at the physical contact.
"Feeling nervous? Oh right, stupid question, the great Xena never gets nervous."
Xena playfully poked Gabrielle in the arm.
"Hey, now who's getting a permanent mark, Gabrielle laughed. Gabrielle's smile was replaced with seriousness. Xena, if you don't want your mother to know about us, I'll understand."
"It's not that Gabrielle. I'm proud of our family. Part of me wants to yell to anyone who will listen that you're my woman and Lycea is our child."
"But?"
"But, I'm not sure if people will accept us."
"I think you mean your mother."
"You know I don't care what people think of me, but I don't want them to think badly of you because of me."
Gabrielle cupped Xena's face in her hands and smiled.
"Xena, you know how much I love you, and if people can't accept us, well that's just too bad. I'm comfortable with who I am and who I choose to live my life with. If your mother doesn't accept us, which I doubt will be the case, then so be it. You'll still be stuck with us."
Xena looked down at Gabrielle trying to hold back the tears that were fighting their way to the surface, and smiled. Gabrielle brought her arm around Xena's back and brought her lips to Xena's.
"I knew I could count on my bard to make me feel better."
"Always."
As if to agree with her mother, Lycea cooed and gurgled, drawing a deep hearty laugh from Xena.
"You too, my little princess."
The three resumed their treck to the village and by mid morning were standing outside of Cyrene's Inn. Xena motioned for the stable boy to come and take care of Argo. She slipped him an extra dinar for his troubles. He knew this was Cyrene's daughter and no slip ups with her mare. As Xena started to enter the inn, Gabrielle pulled her back, reached up and pulled Xena's face to hers.
"All my love to you, Xena."
With renewed courage, Xena entered the dimly lit inn. She saw various sorts drinking and eating, everything looked okay and then motioned for Gabrielle to enter with Lycea. Right away she spotted Belvis, her mother's right hand man. The old man grinned from ear to ear when he saw Xena. Xena loved him like a grandfather and had known him her entire life. She couldn't imagine what the inn would be like if he weren't around. She put her finger up to her lips to silence the man before he gave her away. Belvis nodded and pointed out back. Xena smiled and nodded, then headed for the kitchen.
Cyrene was standing with her back to the kitchen door as Xena entered. She was humming an old tune Xena remembered from childhood. That memory brought a smile to the warrior's lips.
"Hey!" Xena bellowed, "what does a girl have to do to get a drink around here?"
Cyrene spun around and seeing Xena went straight to her only daughter and give her a big hug and kiss.
"Xena!"
"Mother!"
"I'm so glad you've come. How long can you stay?"
"For a while."
Cyrene glanced over Xena's shoulder and saw Gabrielle standing there holding Lycea.
"Who do we have here?"
Xena turned around and looked to Gabrielle for support. The younger woman smiled at Xena and
winked. That was all the encouragement the Warrior needed.
"Mother, I'd like you to meet Lycea, your Granddaughter."
Cyrene gasped, looking first at Xena and then Gabrielle.
"How, when? Oh Xena, a grandchild, how wonderful!"
Cyrene had tears in her eyes. She had waited for years to become a grandmother and now, finally.
"May I hold her?"
Gabrielle handed her the cooing bundle.
"Xena, she looks just like you did at that age, and yet she also looks- " Cyrene cut herself off and thought, "she also looks like Gabrielle."
Xena sensing her mother was slowly figuring it all out, stepped forward. "Mother, there are things we need to discuss, but not right now, tonight after dinner."
"Very well daughter."
Gabrielle tried to stifle a yawn but was caught by both Xena and Cyrene.
"Guess I'm worn out from traveling."
"Xena your old room is waiting for you. Perhaps you and Gabrielle would like to rest before dinner."
Xena looked at Gabrielle with a twinkle in her eye. She knew what that look meant, and it didn't mean nap time.
"Yes, thank you Cyrene."
Xena went to take the baby from her mother, but Cyrene held up her hand.
"You two run along and have your nap, I'll take care of my little bundle of joy."
Cyrene shooed the two out of the kitchen. The last thing Xena and Gabrielle heard was Cyrene telling Lycea of the wonderful stories to be told of Xena's childhood. Gabrielle laughed and Xena rolled her eyes as she led her love up the stairs to their room.
Just as they arrived at the door to the room, Gabrielle felt herself being swept up off her feet.
"Xena, what are you doing?"
"I'm about to carry the woman I love across the threshold."
"Why?"
"Gabrielle, I'm shocked at you."
"What?"
"If you don't know, I'm not going to tell you."
Xena continued standing outside the room with a wide grin on her face.
"Xena!"
"Gabrielle, Xena custom says that when you carry your loved one over the threshold you're asking them to bond with you for life."
"Xena custom?"
"Hmh."
"And just how many have you carried over the threshold?"
"Oh, thousands."
"So, let me get this straight. You're asking me to marry you."
"If you'll have me," came the serious answer. Suddenly Xena was afraid what the answer would be.
"Xena, look at me."
Slowly blue eyes met green.
"Xena, I love you more than anything. Yes, yes, yes, yes, I would be honored to marry you."
A lone tear trickled from Xena's eye. "Gabrielle, I love you so much, I don't even know what to say. You've humbled me by your answer."
Xena hugged her love tightly and using her leg, opened the door and in one swift motion had removed Gabrielle's clothes and placed her on the bed. Xena quickly removed her leathers and slid onto the bed next to Gabrielle. She began to trace small circles on the bards stomach.
"I thought we were going to take a nap."
"Oh we are, but you have to work for it."
"Mmh, I like the sound of that."
"I thought you would."
"So what's my first job?"
"My neck."
"Your neck?"
"It needs attention."
"Oh, your neck."
Gabrielle began kissing Xena's neck, softly at first, then harder. All the while running her hands all over her warriors body. The mere touch of Gabrielle's hands made her shudder. Then strong, callused hands stopped at Xena's breasts and lightly made circles around each nipple until they began to feel pain and pleasure.
"Yes, Gabrielle, harder," pleaded Xena. "Mouth, I need your mouth there."
Gabrielle slid down Xena's body so her face was in line with those beautiful breasts she loved to play with. She rolled her tongue over each nipple, barely stopping to catch her breathe. Xena's own breath was becoming more ragged and Gabrielle knew it wouldn't be long before she was over the edge. Gabrielle spent long minutes sucking each nipple bringing them to a hardened point. She could spend hours just lavishing all her attention on the hardened nubs. This was Xena's most sensitive area and Gabrielle knew all the right spots to bring her lover to climax.
Xena's hips were bucking and raising off the bed, in expectation of what was to come. Gabrielle straddled her warrior, rubbing and kissing all the right areas.
Xena was moaning so loudly Gabrielle was sure Cyrene could hear. "Yes Gabrielle, please, almost. Love you, so much."
"Xena, I love you, I love you."
Beads of perspiration were running down Xena's face, as the moment came. Gabrielle collapsed into her lover's arms and the two quickly fell asleep, holding on to one another tightly.
Gabrielle awoke before Xena knowing it was almost time to feed Lycea. She felt happy and content as she looked at Xena. There would be time for a longer lovemaking session later. She quickly dressed
leaving her lover sleeping. Gabrielle found her daughter being tended to by her doting grandmother. The woman was singing a beautiful ballad to the attentive baby. Gabrielle could only hope her own mother would lavish such attention on her daughter.
"Cyrene, it's time for Lycea's feeding."
"Where's Xena?"
"Still asleep."
Gabrielle took the baby from Cyrene and sat down on the long bench which was placed in front of the kitchen table. Cyrene was confused as to why Gabrielle was the one feeding Lycea and not Xena. But she knew that Xena would explain everything later. Deciding to give Gabrielle her privacy, Cyrene quietly left the kitchen.
In a flash Xena was in the kitchen and taking her place behind Gabrielle.
"Hey, I thought we did this together."
"I didn't want to wake you, you looked so peaceful."
"I am at peace, but only when I have the two of you in my arms."
After a hearty dinner, Xena left Gabrielle at the inn telling one of her stories of their adventures together. Xena, Cyrene and Lycea went for a walk so they could talk in private. Cyrene insisted on holding her new granddaughter while they walked.
"Your brother will be sorry he missed you."
"Yeah, sure," Xena said sarcastically.
"Xena, your brother cares for you very much. And he'll be thrilled to know he has a little niece."
"Uh huh."
"Xena, you need to give your brother a chance. Promise me?"
"I promise, mother."
They came to a bench outside of the stable and sat down. Xena absentmindedly began to stroke Lycea's head. Cyrene broke into a wide grin as she watched her daughter and granddaughter.
"What?"
"I never thought I'd see the day when my daughter's heart was stolen by a mere baby."
"Mother, she's no mere baby."
"So I gathered. Do you care to tell me how and why she looks like you and Gabrielle?"
Xena took a deep breathe, unsure of where to start.
"It's okay daughter, take your time."
"Mother, you know how fond I am of Gabrielle."
Xena looked at her mother for signs of rejection. Not finding any she continued.
"As a matter of fact, I love her."
"I know you do."
"I mean I'm in love with her."
"Xena, I can see it in your eyes every time you look at her."
"And it doesn't bother you?"
"Child, it has always been my wish to see you happy, and praise the gods that Gabrielle has been the one to bring you out of your darkness."
"Oh Mama."
Xena hugged her mother tightly. For a moment she forgot she was a grown woman, ex-warlord, ex destroyer of nations. For now she was a child being held by her mother.
"Now, what about my grandchild?"
"Mother as you know, Gabrielle is Queen of the Amazons, and is held in high regard by Artemis. On Gabrielle's wedding night, she wished that I could give her a child, not Perdicus. Artemis heard her plea and made it so."
"You mean this little child I'm holding is a part of both of you?"
"Yes."
"Oh Xena, she truly is a gift."
"I know mother, and it scares me so."
"But why daughter?"
"Mother, I want her to grow up to be a good woman. I don't ever want to let her down. I'm scared I will."
"Xena, any new parent is scared. You hope and pray you bring your child up to believe in what is right, but ultimately the path they follow is up to them."
"I guess I let you down many times over."
"Xena, I will admit I was disappointed with the path you chose, but no, you never let me down. I am so deeply proud of you and what you've accomplished. I love you daughter. I always have and I always will."
Xena could feel the tears welling up in her eyes and for the first time in a long time let them fall freely.
"I love you too mother."
Later that night while in bed, Xena looked at her sleeping lover and smiled. Never before had her life felt this complete. She leaned over and kissed Gabrielle on the forehead.
"Love you," came the sleepy voice.
"Love you too, bard."
Xena settled the woman into her arms and quickly fell asleep. The darkness from her past slowly pushing itself further into the recess of her mind
Six weeks passed quickly. Lycea was growing like a weed, and could be found spending most of her waking hours tucked safely in Xena's arm. The warrior couldn't get enough of her daughter, and enjoyed the time they spent together.
Gabrielle awoke early to find Xena and Lycea gone. Upon further inspection, she found them out by the barn chopping wood. Actually Xena was chopping wood while Lycea was propped up in her carrier watching.
"So you see," the warrior was explaining, "you want to hit the wood dead center."
Xena raised the ax and sent it crashing down, splitting the piece in half.
"Watch and learn my little princess."
Gabrielle was unable to stifle her laugh. Xena turned around and looked at her love.
"You find splitting wood funny?"
"No," Gabrielle continued to laugh. "Watching you talk to a little baby about splitting wood is."
Xena started to advance on Gabrielle with outstretched arms. Gabrielle knew the passionate look on her lovers face.
"Xena, what are you doing?"
Xena continued to advance the bard, who knew that running away would prove fateful. But knowing her lover as she did Gabrielle had other plans. Just as Xena dove towards Gabrielle, Gabrielle let herself drop to the ground. She lay there and watched Xena fly right over her. But before she could get up strong hands were pinning her down.
"Thought you could out maneuver me, huh?"
"No, not really. But a girl can hope, can't she?"
Xena sat up and took Gabrielle into her arms.
"Xena, you look so happy."
"I am. I really am, for the first time in my life."
Gabrielle leaned over and kissed the warrior hard on the lips.
"Hey, what's that for?"
"Does a girl have to have a reason to kiss her woman?"
"No, I guess not."
Gabrielle started to get up. "But, if you don't like it."
"Get back down here Bard," came the command.
"Or else."
"Or else, the payback tonight will be torture."
Gabrielle got up and headed towards the inn.
"Looking forward to it."
Xena turned and looked at Lycea. "You've got quite a mother there kid."
Gabrielle was helping Cyrene with dinner when Xena and Lycea entered. Gabrielle stopped what she was doing and put her hands on her hips.
"I wondered when my girls would come home."
"Had things to do, places to see." Xena handed Lycea to Gabrielle. "She's hungry."
"Mom, I'll be back to help," Gabrielle offered.
"Off with you both, I can manage." Cyrene shooed her daughters out of the kitchen. As much as she loved Gabrielle she welcomed the silence after listening to her all afternoon. She wondered how Xena put up with it, then smiled to herself, love is blind, or in Xena's case, deaf.
After dinner Xena suggested to Gabrielle a walk in the moonlight. Lycea was asleep in her crib, with Cyrene more than happy to baby-sit. Xena held the door open for Gabrielle, and led her out into the night air. Gabrielle linked her arm through Xena's, a jolt of electricity surging though each at the physical contact. The two walked on, content not to speak. They finally came to the edge of the river and sat down next to one another on a large boulder. Gabrielle nestled her head into Xena's shoulder, while Xena put her arm around the bard and held her tightly. The warrior let out a sigh as Gabrielle placed her hand on her thigh.
"That was a big sigh," commented Gabrielle.
"I've wanted you in my arms all day. Somehow everything falls into place when I'm holding and touching you."
"I know what you mean, I feel it too. Sometimes I just need to touch you and if I don't, I feel like I'll go crazy. Xena, is there something wrong with me, for feeling that way?"
"Gabrielle, you're not crazy. I feel the same way."
"You do?"
"Yeah." Xena paused a moment to gather her thoughts. "Gabrielle, you're a part of me, and when we"re not together I feel as if a part of me is missing."
"Yes, I feel that too."
Xena got down on one knee and took Gabrielle's hands in hers. "Gabrielle, I'm going to do this right, unlike the other night."
Gabrielle could see the seriousness in her lover's blue eyes as she prepared to speak.
"Gabrielle, you know how much I love you and our daughter. I know you said that you would consent to marry me, I'd like us to be married as soon as possible."
Gabrielle threw herself into Xena's waiting arms.
"I take it your answer is yes."
Gabrielle looked at Xena with such tenderness she had to look away, for fear of crying.
"Oh, Xena, nothing would make me happier than to be married to you. The sooner the better."
"We can leave tomorrow."
"Okay, but Xena, wouldn't you like to visit Solan first?"
"Yeah, I think I would."
"Xena, I love you."
"I love you too."
"You know Xena, we need to practice."
"Practice what?"
"I want to make sure we have this down right, for when Ephiny joins us."
Gabrielle leaned in and gave Xena a deep, long kiss. The warrior unable to keep quiet moaned loudly. Gabrielle stopped kissing Xena, causing the warrior to open her eyes.
"Gabrielle, what is it?"
"Yup, we definitely need more practice."
"Why?"
"Because, you're not loud enough."
"We'll see who's not loud enough, bard."
Xena scooped Gabrielle into her arms and began kissing her passionately, causing the younger woman to moan, in Xena's estimation, quite loudly. A candlemark later warrior and bard were
walking back to the inn arm in arm.
"You're quiet. Everything okay my bard?"
"Just thinking."
"Care to share?"
"I was just thinking about what it will be like to be your wife. How nice it will be when we visit the Amazons, and they know you're mine, and that will mean hands off."
"Gabrielle, I'm already yours, heart and soul. Don't you know that by now?"
"Yes," came the meek answer. "Xena, I'll never understand how someone as gorgeous and wonderful as yourself can be in love with a farm girl from nowhere."
Xena stopped walking and put her hands on Gabrielle's shoulders.
"You've got it all wrong, Gabrielle. Your beauty and intelligence, these qualities take my breath away, and I'll spend the rest of my days thanking the gods for you."
"I guess we"re stuck with each other then."
"So you really think you can manage being married to an old ex- warlord?"
Gabrielle looked up at Xena and grinned. "It's a sacrifice I guess I'll just have to make. Besides, you'd starve to death without me."
"I don't know, Solari is pretty good with a frying pan."
"Taken."
"I know, Meg."
"Xena, would you really want to stare at yourself all day long? Not that I mind it, of course."
"Of course."
Xena put her arm around Gabrielle and drew her close.
"Come on, knowing our daughter she's probably screaming at Mother wanting to be fed."
"And Xena, you also mentioned something about a certain payback tonight?"
The two walked on arm in arm unaware of the figure that hid in the trees, watching and waiting......
The Inn was quiet when Xena and Gabrielle returned from their walk. Xena stayed downstairs while Gabrielle went on ahead to their room. Gabrielle was putting on her night shift as Xena entered the room with a bottle in her hand. She placed the bottle on the floor next to the bed.
"Is Lycea asleep?"
"Out like a light."
"Good."
"What's in the bottle?"
"Later."
"Xena!"
"Gabrielle!"
"Come on, what's in the bottle?"
"Paybacks are a bitch, huh?" Xena's eyebrow shot up, sending a warning signal out to Gabrielle.
"Xena, I was only kidding."
"I wasn't." Xena began to advance the blonde woman.
"Xena, what about Lycea?"
"Out like a light, remember?"
"Oh yeah." Gabrielle began backing up, and soon found herself in the corner of the room. "I have a headache?"
"I'll make you forget it."
Just as Xena was ready to scoop the bard into her arms, she darted under the warriors arm and scooted away.
"Ah, I love it when you play hard to get. But I'll get you."
"I know."
"So, you're gonna make it hard for me?"
"Count on it my warrior."
Xena lunged again coming within inches of Gabrielle. Both women knowing Xena could capture Gabrielle at any time, but each enjoying the chase.
"You're getting old warrior."
"Hah." Xena's finger brushed Gabrielle's arm, sending shivers down the younger woman's back. A split second decision found Gabrielle diving under the bed and out the other side. Only the bed separated the two.
"Oh, you're good, very good," laughed Xena.
"I have many skills, Xena."
"Do I get to see them?"
Gabrielle smiled and began to slowly and seductively remove her shift. Xena stood, eyes riveted on her lover. She could gaze forever at the now firm body standing before her. Gabrielle held out her hand to Xena, and then pulled the taller woman down onto the bed. In a flash, Gabrielle was straddling the mesmerized warrior. Big strong hands placed themselves on Gabrielle's hips. Firm hips that Xena loved to caress and touch. She slowly moved her hands to Gabrielle's arms and pulled her down on top of her. Just as Gabrielle brought her lips to Xena's mouth, the warrior flipped the bard over on her back, and placed her strong legs either side of Gabrielle's hips. Xena removed from her cleavage, a piece of rope. She tied Gabrielle's hands to the bed post, sat back and smiled at her love.
"Xena, what are you doing?"
"Payback time."
Xena looked into Gabrielle's eyes and could see the uncertainty. She started to remove the binds but was stopped.
"What are you doing?"
"Gabrielle, I'm sorry, I don't want you doing anything you're not comfortable with."
"Xena, I may be a little nervous, but I trust you completely. I know that you would never hurt me."
"Are you sure?"
"The binds stay."
"Gabrielle, I do love you."
"Well, then you better get to showing me how much."
"Close your eyes," came the soft low command.
Gabrielle shut her eyes and felt a tingle at the anticipation of what was to come. Xena reached down and picked up the bottle and removed the cap. She poured a small amount of the mixture into her hands and worked it in. She then placed her hands on Gabrielle's breasts and began to massage each one. Gabrielle didn't know what the warrior was putting on her, only that it was warm and smelled like lilac.
"Oh, Xena!" the bard moaned.
"You like?"
"Yes, very much. Don't stop."
Xena could feel her own breathing becoming ragged at the sight of Gabrielle's hips moving in rhythm to her building excitement. Xena turned Gabrielle over onto her stomach, and began pouring the oil all over her back. She began massaging Gabrielle's back, lightly at first, then harder. Xena leaned down and brushed her lips across her lovers back, causing a loud moan to escape the bards lips. Xena could feel her own wetness as she straddled the buttocks of her woman. She didn't know how long she could hold her own release. Before Gabrielle had come into her life, Xena could have gone on for hours, but something about her bard made that impossible. With Gabrielle she had learned how to completely open up and give of herself. In the months since they had become intimate, Xena found it harder and harder to hold her emotions back.
"Xena, please, I'm close."
"Just a little longer," Xena purred into her ear.
Xena reached down and removed a blindfold and feather from under the bed. She placed the feather off to the side hidden from sight. Xena rolled Gabrielle back onto her back and quickly put the blindfold on.
"If I do anything you don't like, just say Lycea, and I'll stop."
"Ok."
Xena took the feather and lightly brushed it by Gabrielle's face. She could feel the air disruption but couldn't quite figure out what caused it.
"Xena?"
"Sshh."
Xena moved the feather down to Gabrielle's throat, then between her breasts. Beads of perspiration were running down the bard's face as Xena tormented first one sensitive nub, then the other.
"Oh Xena, please, almost," came the husky voice.
Hips were bucking and thrashing, each woman moaning louder and louder. Finally, the feather made it's way to Gabrielle's most sensitive area.
"Please, Xena, I need." Gabrielle couldn't finish her breathing was so labored.
"What do you need?"
"I need you."
"Yes"
"In me, now!" the bard commanded.
"Your wish is my command, my bard."
Quickly Xena removed her leathers and tossed them aside. Xena moved down to Gabrielle's thighs and began to softly kiss each one. The feather, now tossed aside in favor of a more personal touch, lay on the floor.
"By the gods, Xena, I can't take much more." There was something about being tied and blindfolded that made Gabrielle feel like she never had before. Each touch, each kiss, was magnified. She had never felt such desire before. Xena entered her lover, causing the woman to shake violently.
"Oh yes, Xena, yes! Over me now!" came the plea.
Before turning around, Xena undid the ties and blindfold. Gabrielle's hands went to Xena's core as Xena took her fingers and entered her lover again. Both women were licking and sucking as fast and hard as they could.
Each woman felt the wave of orgasm at the same time.
"Oh Gabrielle, what you do to me, Gaaaab."
"Xeeeeeena," the bard screamed.
Finally the quakes stopped and Xena moved up alongside Gabrielle. She took the younger woman in her arms, and held her tightly.
"Gabrielle, I love you," the tired warrior murmured.
"I love you too," came the sleepy response.
Both women settled into one another's arms, content to let sleep over take them.
"Wow, paybacks!" Gabrielle said before falling asleep.
"Certainly are a bitch," the warrior laughed.
Both women were soon asleep, until a small voice demanded dinner.
"Xena, is this the real payback, here?" Gabrielle said as she got out of bed to get her daughter.
Xena just sat in bed laughing as she watched her woman get their daughter.
Four months had passed since Xena, Gabrielle and Lycea had arrived in Amphipolis. Gabrielle could tell Xena was beginning to get restless, and knew it was time to be moving on.
Gabrielle went outside to wait for her girls to come back from fishing. Deciding to meet them halfway, Gabrielle headed off in the direction of the river. Halfway there, a tall familiar figure was approaching. A figure Gabrielle knew only too well. Strapped on her back was a now 6 month old Lycea, who loved this method of travel. Xena held up a dozen or more fish for Gabrielle to see. When the two finally met, Gabrielle took Xena into her arms, fish and all, and hugged her tightly. She gave Lycea a big kiss on her head. A head that was now completely covered with jet black hair just like her mother. Except for having Gabrielle's mouth, Lycea was completely Xena. Sometimes Gabrielle looked into her baby blue eyes and pretended she was looking at Xena when she was still an innocent babe.
"Happy to see me?"
"Mmm nice catch," replied Gabrielle
"You, or the fish?"
"Hey, come on Xena, you honestly think I would take fish over you?"
Xena looked at Gabrielle and grinned. "Yup."
Gabrielle lightly punched Xena in the stomach.
"Hey!"
"Just a love tap. You'll live." Gabrielle turned and looked into Xena's blue eyes. "Xena, it's time."
"For what?"
"Time that we were back on the road again. I know you're getting restless."
"I know you've enjoyed the time we"ve spent here."
"Xena, it's time we went and visited Solan."
"Are you sure?"
"Listen warrior mine, tomorrow, you, me, our daughter, on the road again."
"Yes ma"am."
The following morning found Xena and Gabrielle all packed up and ready to go. Cyrene was holding Lycea for as long as she could. She hated to see them leave but knew that Xena needed to be on the road again. And that meant Gabrielle and Lycea. Cyrene gave one finally kiss to Lycea and handed her to Xena who gently placed her in her carrier. Xena mounted Argo while Gabrielle took her usual place behind Xena on their faithful horse.
Two days later the three entered Centaur land. Gabrielle was in the middle of telling Xena her latest story when Xena stopped Argo, dismounted and helped Gabrielle down.
"Xena, what is it?"
The warrior broke into a wide grin. "Solan, you can come out of the tree."
In a flash, the young boy, almost a man jumped out of the tree and landed at his mother's feet.
"Xena! Gabrielle!"
Solan almost knocked Xena over with his strong hug.
"I almost had you."
"Yes you did," Xena replied proudly. "I'm impressed."
Solan gave Gabrielle a hug and noticed Lycea who didn't like being left out of the conversation.
"Who's that?"
Gabrielle, not sure how Xena wanted to handle this stepped forward and removed Lycea from her carrier. "Solan, I'd like you to meet my daughter, Lycea."
"Actually Solan, Lycea is our daughter."
"May I hold her?"
Gabrielle handed Solan his sister who happily gurgled in her older brother's arms.
"I think she likes me."
Xena who was beaming, put her arm around her son. "Of course she does."
"She's so pretty."
"We"re kind of partial to her," laughed Gabrielle.
"Solan, where is your Uncle, I would like to see him."
Solan's eyes darkened. "He died six moons ago."
Xena felt as if she had been kicked in the stomach. She"d let her son down again. She wasn't there when he needed her.
"What happened?"
"There was sickness, many people got it, the healers couldn't help." A lot of people died."
"Oh Solan, I'm so sorry, your father was a good man," Xena said quietly.
"Who's been taking care of you?" asked Gabrielle, concerned the boy wasn't being properly cared for.
"I'm old enough to take care of myself," the young boy answered indignantly.
Gabrielle looked at Xena and could see the pain in her eyes. She wanted desperately to take the woman in her arms and erase the pain.
"How long are you staying?"
"As long as we need to," Xena said.
Solan grinned, a grin that reminded Gabrielle of his mother. "Great! Xena, I have so much to tell you."
The four made their way to the village while Solan still held his baby sister. Xena and Gabrielle were greeted warmly when they arrived. Everyone remembering all the two women had done to save their village from Dagnon. Xena hated all the fuss but Gabrielle took all in stride. Saying just the right thing. The family settled into Solan's hut and put a very tired Lycea down for a long nap.
Later that evening, Solan asked Xena if she would go for a walk. There was something he needed to talk to her about. Xena jumped at the chance to spend some time alone with her son. They hadn't walked very far when Xena noticed Solan was nervous and fidgety.
"Solan, is everything okay?"
"I'm not sure where to start."
"The beginning is usually a good place to start," Xena grinned.
Solan looked at Xena with concern.
"Hey, what is it?" Xena put a reassuring hand on his shoulder.
"I don't want you to hate me."
"Solan, I could never hate you, you are my, my friend." That was close thought Xena.
Xena decided to take Solan down by the river to spot where they had said their last goodbye to one another. Solan sat down next to Xena and began tossing pebbles into the calm water. Small ripples formed each time the pebbles hit.
"Xena, I-that is, oh I can't do this."
"Just take a deep breath, let it out and start talking."
Solan took a deep breath and slowly let it out. "Xena, I know who you are."
A shock wave went through Xena. Her mind was in overdrive. What did he mean? Did he mean he knew about her past as a warlord? No, he already knew all about her past as a warlord. Did he know she was his mother? If so what would she say to him?
"Xena, I know you're my mother."
There! The moment she had been dreading for eleven years had finally come. He knew! Oh how me must hate her. And yet he seemed pleased to see her when she arrived. But then again, Solan was fond of Gabrielle, and he had been taken with Lycea.
"How did you find out?"
"Uncle told me before he died. He said if anything happened to him, you'd take care of me."
Xena almost choked on the lump in her throat.
"Xena, do you hate me?"
"Solan, I could never hate you." Xena grabbed the boy and hugged him tightly. Relief washed through her.
"But you gave me away, I thought maybe you didn't want me, or like me."
"Listen to me, I didn't give you up because I wanted to." Xena looked at her young son with sadness in her eyes. "I gave you up so you wouldn't become like me. You would have been a target for my enemies. I needed to know you would grow up safe and loved. I'm so sorry, I know you must hate me."
"Hate you? I don't hate you."
"Is there anything you want to ask me?"
Solan hesitated before answering.
"It's okay, you can ask me anything."
"I was wondering if you, well, how do you feel about me?"
"There hasn't been a day go by since you were born that I don't think about you. Solan, you're my son, I love you very much. I always have and I always will." Xena laughed remembering the same words her mother had recently told her.
Solan looked up at his mother and began to cry. Years of wanting a mother and now knowing he had one, one who loved him, overwhelmed the boy. Xena held her son tightly until his sobbing became small whimpers. Finally, the boy raised his blue eyes to Xena.
"You once told me that you and my father used to sing together. Would you please sing for me?"
Xena's heart soared. She had longed to sing for her baby, and now she could. She sang an old lullaby her mother used to sing to her. Exhausted from the emotional turmoil, Solan fell asleep in his mother's strong arms. After a while Xena lifted the boy and carried him home.
Gabrielle was rocking Lycea when Xena entered with Solan. She gently placed him on his bed and covered him up. He stirred and looked up at Xena and smiled. She caressed his arm until he fell back to sleep. Xena felt like an emotional wreck. Gabrielle, sensing Xena's mood, put Lycea in her crib, and walked over to Xena, taking the taller woman in her arms. The warrior felt her legs buckle under her.
"Xena, what happened? What's wrong?"
Unable to hold back the tears any longer, Xena cried unabashedly in her lovers arms. Gabrielle led her warrior to their bed and sat her down. Still holding Xena, Gabrielle caressed her cheek.
"It's okay love, whatever it is, it's okay."
"Oh Gabrielle, he knows, Solan knows I'm his mother."
"Oh Xena, how?"
Xena relayed the story to Gabrielle who soon had tears in her eyes. Hours later the two women finally slipped into bed. Gabrielle had just closed her eyes when Lycea began to cry. Not wanting to disturb her sleeping lover, she got up to tend to the baby. When she got out into the room, Solan was sitting in a rocking chair, rocking the small bundle. Gabrielle stopped in the shadows and looked at the two. She sensed Xena standing by her side and slid an arm around the woman's waist. Not wanting to disrupt the moment between brother and sister they let Solan hold the baby. Only when she began to cry again did the two put in appearance.
"Solan, thank you for taking such good care of your sister," Gabrielle praised.
"I like having a sister Gabrielle."
Xena tousled the boys hair. "It's late, you need to go back to bed."
Xena picked the boy up and slung him over her shoulders.
"I'm not a baby Xena, I can put myself to bed."
"I know, but humor me, I never got to do this when you were little," Xena said as she put the boy back into bed. He fell asleep the minute his head hit the pillow. Xena returned to Gabrielle, who was back in bed, letting Lycea feed.
"Xena, I wish Lycea knew how special this time is, when we feed her," Gabrielle said as she squirmed and wiggled to find a comfortable spot against Xena. "Guess we'll have to tell her when she's older."
"Gabrielle, kids never like to hear about intimate their parents are."
"Oh, you're right, I just thought about my parents, ugh."
Xena laughed. "I know what you mean."
The following morning Solan was up early following Xena everywhere she went. He helped her feed and groom Argo, then watched as she practiced her various drills. He was beaming with pride as he told people that she was his mother. Xena was pleased as well. For the first time in eleven years she could freely admit that Solan was her son. Her fear that someone would try to hurt Solan because of her past was always going to be there, but she knew the Centaurs would protect him with their lives. She hoped it never came to that.
"Xena, can I ask you a question?"
Xena stopped her drills and went over to her son and sat down. "You can always ask me anything."
"I'm not sure I understand how Lycea is my sister if you are both her mother."
Xena wished that Gabrielle was here, she'd be able to explain things better.
"Well," Xena swallowed and tried to explain.
Solan looked up at his mother and smiled. "It's okay Xena, just take a deep breath, let it out and start talking."
Xena smiled down at her young son. "Solan I love Gabrielle very much and because of that love, the gods gave us a child."
Solan's eyes grew wide with excitement. "Wow the gods!" Solan suddenly became serious.
"Solan, what's wrong?"
"Now that uncle is gone, you and Lycea are my only family."
Solan hadn't heard Gabrielle approach. "Hey, what about me? Don't I qualify as family?"
"But we"re not related."
Xena was relieved to see Gabrielle. She"d know the right words to make Solan feel better. Gabrielle sat down next to the boy and put her arm around his shoulder.
"Solan, you weren't related to your uncle and yet you loved him like a father. Right?"
Solan brightened. "Yeah, you're right."
"You see Solan, even though you and I aren't related by blood, I still love you like a son. Besides, Lycea is going to be counting on her big brother to show her the ropes."
Xena looked at the love her life and mouthed the words, "Thanks."
"Does that mean you'll be visiting a lot?"
Xena looked to Gabrielle for help, who was looking at the fragile boy and smiled. "Solan, I noticed some berries growing over in the pasture. Would you please go pick some?"
"Anything Gabrielle." Solan was gone in a flash. "Happy to please his new found family.
"Xena?"
"I know Gabrielle, I know."
"We can't just leave him here, not when he knows he has a mother."
"Gabrielle, I don't know if I can take care of you and Lycea, never mind Solan."
"Xena, I'm not going to have this conversation with you again, but I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself."
A wide grin flashed across Xena's face causing Gabrielle to shift uncomfortably.
"What?"
"Let's see, you took care of yourself when you met the Titans, got arrested when you tried to save Cleopatra, fell in love with Joxer, got bitten by the Bacchae. I could go on, but why bother?"
Gabrielle lightly punched Xena in the arm. "Hey, it wasn't my fault about the Joxer thing." Gabrielle placed a kiss on Xena's cheek. "Xena, I think it's time Solan met his grandmother."
"Oh Gabrielle, I don't know." Xena got up and began to pace. "I need time to think."
"Xena, I think you and Argo need a nice long ride to Amphipolis."
Xena bent down and kissed Gabrielle firmly on the mouth. Leave it to her love to know just what she needed.
"Think I'll go for a walk."
"Good idea."
Gabrielle was putting the finishing touches on dinner when Xena came back. She was in a better frame of mind then when she had left.
That night after dinner had been cleaned up and the children put to bed, Xena led Gabrielle outside. She found a tree to sit against and pulled her love down into her lap. Xena breathed in the scent of Gabrielle's hair.
"I love the way you smell."
Gabrielle put her arms around Xena's neck and drew her in for a long kiss. When they broke apart Xena looked deeply into Gabrielle's eyes.
"I'm leaving in the morning. You're right, mother needs to know. I'll only be gone for a day or two, then I'll be back for you."
"Xena, we can meet you in Amphipolis in a few days."
"No, I don't want you traveling alone with the children."
Gabrielle was all set to argue the point, but bit her lip, not wanting to say anything that would keep Xena from going to Amphipolis. "Yes dear, whatever you say."
Gabrielle nestled her head in Xena's shoulders. "I'll miss you, even if it's for a few days."
"I'll miss you too, my bard."
The two woman sat and held one another, until they felt Morpheus start to overtake them.
The following morning found Xena up early with saddle bags packed. She exited the hut carrying Lycea in her arms. Xena hated to be away from her family even for a minute, buy knew she needed to confront her mother about her grandson. The warrior planted soft kisses on the baby's head, then handed her to Gabrielle, who was fighting back tears at the thought of being separated from her love. Solan who was standing by Argo handed his mother the reins as she bent down and kissed the top of his blonde head.
"You help take care of Gabrielle and Lycea."
"I will, I promise."
Gabrielle reached up and kissed Xena hard on the lips.
"I'll miss you, Warrior."
In one swift movement Xena was atop Argo and galloping off. The pair made good time traveling to Amphipolis and arrived after the dinner rush. Xena found her mother sitting at a table with a mug in her hand. She broke out into a huge grin at the sight of her daughter.
"Xena, you've come back? Where is my beautiful granddaughter?"
"She and Gabrielle are visiting friends."
Cyrene could see the look of concern across her daughter's face. "Xena is everything all right? Are Gabrielle and Lycea okay?"
"They're fine."
Xena poured a mug of port then sat down beside her mother.
"Mother, I've come to tell you something important, and I hope you'll listen to everything I have to say before passing judgment."
Xena took a deep breath, let it out and laughed to herself as she thought of Solan. A candlemark later Cyrene had all the details of young Solan's life. Xena waited for her mother to speak, unsure of what her reaction would be.
Cyrene could still feel the shock waves rolling through her body as she let Xena's words sink in.
"My poor daughter, life has been unkind to you."
"No mother, I've been unkind to life, hurting everything and everyone in my path. I hope you can forgive me for not telling you. I only did it to protect Solan."
Cyrene was indeed hurt by what Xena had just told her. Knowing her daughter she knew that she was punishing herself everyday for what she had done. Cyrene knew that nothing she could say could alter what had happened all those years before.
"Xena, you go get my grandchildren and bring them here!"
Cyrene put an arm around Xena and drew her close. The warrior felt as if an enormous weight had been lifted from her shoulders. She went to bed that night feeling freer than she had in a long time. Sleep eluded her though as she hadn't been separated from Gabrielle since they became a couple. Right about this time, Gabrielle would be snuggled tightly against Xena. She wondered if Gabrielle was asleep, then laughed. "Of course she's asleep. Gabrielle loves sleep."
Morning found Xena up early to head back to her waiting family. Cyrene packed Xena enough food to feed a small army. She looked at her daughter and smiled.
"What?" asked Xena.
Cyrene put her arm around Xena. "I am so proud of you, daughter."
Xena leaned down and kissed her mother on the cheek. Finally Xena and Cyrene had the kind of relationship that had eluded them for years. Xena was determined to never let her mother down again.
"Hurry back daughter."
"We will," Xena replied as she saddled Argo.
Xena reached her family just as they were sitting down to dinner. Xena was just getting off Argo when Gabrielle came running outside. Small hands came around her waist and pulled her into a tight hug. Xena lifted her lover up off the ground and twirled her around, then gently put her down in order to kiss her.
"Xena, I missed you so much."
"I missed you too."
A moment later Solan flew out of the hut and ran into Xena's waiting arms.
"Mother, you came back!"
Xena fought back the tears that threatened to spill. In all her dreams she never expected to hear Solan call her mother. She kissed her young son, then put an arm around Gabrielle and Solan, leading them into the hut. She immediately went over to Lycea and picked her up. Lycea's face lit up and the sight of her mother.
"I missed you my little princess."
Lycea cooed and smiled for Xena, making the warrior laugh. Gabrielle took another plate and loaded it with stew for her hungry warrior. Xena sat down holding Lycea in one arm and used the other to eat her stew.
"Xena, you're going to spoil her."
"Nonsense Gabrielle, babies should be held." Xena looked at Lycea and smiled. "Isn't that right?"
As if on cue Lycea gurgled causing everyone to laugh, including Lycea. Xena looked at her young son and saw for the first time how much like her he was.
"So Xena, how is mom?"
"Looking forward to a visit. Solan, we"re leaving in the morning."
Solan felt as though his world was crashing down around him. Maybe she was mad because he had called her mother. She didn't seem upset. She kissed him hello.
"When will you come back to visit?"
"I don't know when we'll get back this way."
Solan stood up and ran out of the hut. He didn't want his mother to see him cry.
"What's wrong with him?"
"Way to go warrior love of mine."
"What?"
Gabrielle loved Xena but sometimes she could be so dense. "Xena, Solan thinks you're leaving him behind."
Panic swept across Xena's face. She stood up and handed Lycea to Gabrielle.
"I did it again."
Xena went out to look for Solan. She knew he"d be by the river so she made her way to their spot. She spotted the boy tossing stones into the water and went to sit beside him. She could see he had been crying.
"I'm sorry Solan."
"For what?"
"Sometimes I don't say things the right way. Especially to those that I care about the most. Solan, you're coming with us. We"re not leaving you behind. I'll always be here for you."
"Do you really mean it?"
"I never say what I don't mean. Come on, let's get back and finish eating."
Xena and Solan walked back to the hut, hand in hand. After supper Xena took her young son outside to play. Before long the two were on the ground in a mock fight. Gabrielle was standing at the door holding Lycea, watching the antics between mother and son.
"Lycea before long you'll be on the ground with mom doing the same thing."
Solan couldn't remember when he"d had such fun. As much as he loved uncle, the Centaur had never played with him like this. He wanted to pinch himself to make sure that this wasn't a dream.
"Solan it's time for bed, we have an early start in the morning."
"Oh Gabrielle, do I have to? Just a little more time, please?"
"Yeah Gabrielle, just a few more minutes?" Xena chimed in.
Gabrielle knew the parental roles were drawn. She was going to be the rule enforcer whereby Xena the great warrior princess was going to be the fun parent. Gabrielle was right, for in the years to come they would argued a good deal about what the children could and couldn't do. But Gabrielle was secretly pleased that Xena had learned to be a patient, loving parent to their children.
"Sorry, off to bed."
Solan reluctantly got up and brushed himself off. Xena swept him off the ground and carried him over her shoulder and into the hut. He started giggling and couldn't stop until his mother plopped him down in bed. A look of seriousness flashed across his small features.
"Solan, what's wrong?"
"I'm not sure what I should call Gabrielle."
"What do you want to call her?"
"Can I call her mum?"
Xena choked back the emotion she felt well up in her throat. "I don't know, let's ask her?" Xena called for Gabrielle who came right away.
"Solan has a question he"d like to ask you."
Gabrielle sat down on the edge of the bed.
"Gabrielle, can I call you mum?"
Gabrielle drew the boy into a fierce hug. "I'd be honored. Of course you may." Gabrielle kissed her new son on the forehead. "Goodnight."
Solan felt as though he would burst. He had never been this happy. He wasn't sure who he should be thanking, but whoever it was had his devotion.
"Goodnight."
Solan snuggled down into bed and was asleep before his head hit the pillow. Xena pulled Gabrielle up by the arm and let her outside, where she drew her love into a tight hug.
"I love you so very much, my bard, my lover, the mother of my children."
"I love you too, more than I think you know."
"So, after we visit mother, do we go visit your family or do we go visit the Amazons so I can make an honest woman of you?"
"It won"t matter Xena, either way my folks will be angry."
Xena drew Gabrielle tighter into her embrace. "What do you mean?"
"Xena, they"ll be angry if I visit them and I'm not married, and they"ll be angry if I arrive married." Gabrielle let go of Xena and headed into the hut. "I'm going to bed."
Later that night after making love, Gabrielle lay in Xena's strong embrace stroking her warriors arm.
"Gabrielle, we don't have to visit your family if you don't want to."
"They"ll be angry if we don't."
"Seems as if they"ll be angry no matter what. But we do have to face them sooner or later, they need to know about Lycea."
"Later is good."
Xena laughed and pulled the bard tighter to her. Gabrielle relaxed in her warrior's arms, bringing her peace and finally sleep.
Morning brought a flurry of activity. Xena readied Argo for the journey back to Amphipolis while Gabrielle helped Solan pack. When Gabrielle went to check on Lycea, she was not in her crib. The bard smiled and headed for the door knowing where she would find her daughter. Xena was holding the small bundle while getting Argo ready.
"Lycea, I never thought I could be this happy. I never thought I deserved such happiness. But your mother saw to it I changed my mind. You just remember how special she really is. Every time I look at you, I'm completely overwhelmed. Yeah, Xena the great warrior princess, overwhelmed by a little bundle of baby. I hope I never disappoint you, or let you down in any way."
"You won"t Xena."
Xena turned around and faced the familiar voice.
"What if she hates me when she finds out what I am?"
"Were Xena, what you were," came the stern reply. "Xena, Lycea will love you because you are her mother, the one she relies on to keep her safe and happy."
Xena hugged Gabrielle with her free arm. "Always know what to say, don't you? I don't know what I'd do without you."
"Starve," Gabrielle laughed.
Xena looked down at Gabrielle and laughed.
It was mid morning before the family headed out. Solan had wanted to say goodbye to everyone and Xena didn't want to push the boy. By mid afternoon Xena decided to stop and let Solan rest. She didn't want the boy tired out on his first day of traveling. Xena left Gabrielle to set up camp while she took Solan with her to catch dinner. The boy was excited at his first fishing lesson. Xena stood in the cold water waiting for her catch when Solan slipped on a patch of slick ground. The boy landed head first into the icy cold water. Quicker than the eyes could see, Xena hauled the sputtering boy out of the water.
"Are you okay?"
"Yes," came the embarrassed reply.
Xena lifted the boy up and carried him back to camp where she deposited him in front of the fire. Gabrielle rushed to his side and began to unbutton his shirt.
"You need to get out of these wet clothes.
Panic washed across his face. "Mum, not in front of you!"
"Okay, but you need to get out of these clothes and get warm."
"Yes, mum."
Solan walked off into behind a group of tress and removed his clothes.
Gabrielle felt a warm rush of happiness go through her when Solan called her mum. Somehow it felt right. She felt a mother's love for the boy, even though he wasn't born to her. Gabrielle wanted more than anything to be married to Xena, and then they really would be a family.
Xena walked over to the saddlebags, removed a shift and tossed it to Solan. The boy wasted no time putting it on. Once changed he came and sat down by the fire to get warm. Xena was sitting off by herself sharpening her sword.
"Mother, are you angry with me?"
Xena stopped sharpening her sword and came over to sit next to Solan. She looked down at her young son who looked so vulnerable. A grin spread across her face.
"No, but when we get to Amphipolis, we learn how not to scare dinner away."
"What will we have tonight, what will we eat?"
"Don't worry, my mother packed some food for the return trip."
After a dinner of dried meat and apples, Solan went straight to bed. He wasn't used to traveling by foot all day. Lycea made it known she was ready for her dinner. Gabrielle picked up her daughter, sat down and leaned against a large rock for support. Before she could settle in Xena was behind her sliding into place. Lycea happily ate while Xena slowly caressed Gabrielle's arm.
"Mmh, that feels nice."
"It feels nice to do it."
With her other hand Xena lightly rubbed the top of Lycea's head. She could feel the bond between them tighten. Even though she could never erase her past, she could build a future which would be full of love and brightness. The darkness that had once surrounded her no longer seemed quite as dark.
"Xena, when I first met you, I never dreamed that you'd learn-" Gabrielle stopped short not wanting to say the wrong thing and upset Xena.
"Learn how to love and trust people. It's okay love, I know what I was and I know what I am"
"Oh Xena, I'm sorry."
"Don't be love. Lately I've had a lot of time to think, and if it weren't for you, I wouldn't be here right now. And I wouldn't trade this for anything."
"Wow!" laughed Gabrielle, "you're even talking more."
Xena poked Gabrielle in the ribs causing the bard to laugh. Both women looked down at their daughter who was laughing at her two mother'.
"Xena, look! Even Lycea is laughing."
"She's a happy baby. Takes after you."
Gabrielle felt all warm and fuzzy inside. "Xena, I love you."
"I love you too, my little bard."
"Hey, I'm not so little."
"That you're not." With that Xena leaned down and kissed Gabrielle on the neck.
"Xena, I can't wait to visit Ephiny and be joined."
"Me too. Gabrielle, you don't know how long I've wanted this."
"Then I guess we"d better get to Amphipolis and fast."
"First thing tomorrow."
Xena wrapped her arm tightly around Gabrielle's waist. Hours later the two were still in one another's arms.
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