Sapphic Voices General Fiction

E-mails at Christmas

Stacie:

I thought I would write and tell you how excited we are to see you this Christmas at mom and dad’s. The kids have not seen you in quite some time and I know they will enjoy the time with you. Take care, and have a safe trip. We will see you Christmas day.

Your brother,

Gene


Gene:

Thanks for writing. I am also looking forward to seeing everyone at Christmas. With everything as hectic as it is in all our lives, to often we miss each other in passing. I am especially looking forward to seeing the kids. It has been over a year since I last saw them, and I am sure they have grown like weeds.

I will let you go for now. Take care, and be safe. See you at Christmas.

Your sis,

Stacie


Stacie:

Wanda and I are wondering if you plan to bring Kelly this Christmas? Write me back.

Gene


Gene:

Yes, of course I will be bringing Kelly for Christmas. What kind of question is that? I would certainly not leave my partner at home all alone at Christmas.

Stacie


Stacie:

You are an adult, and thus capable of making your own choices. In as much if you choose to bring Kelly to Christmas at mom and dad’s house, I will be forced to leave my wife and children at Wanda’s families house for the day. You know I believe your life style is intrinsically wrong, and I can not afford to allow my children to be exposed to such a potentially harmful thing. My children are the most important thing in the world to me, and I would go to any lengths to protect their innocence. I am sure you understand my position.

Gene


Gene:

I do not understand! How am I or Kelly a danger to your children. We are normal individuals, who pose no danger to your children. Above and beyond that, how will our sexuality even be at question they are very young children. What do you expect, that we will be fucking in the middle of the living room floor when you come in on Christmas day?

Stacie


Stacie:

Do not be impertinent. It is a simple fact that what you do is wrong, and though I still love you, I, nor Wanda, will allow our children to be exposed to a homosexual lifestyle. Though I will not be able to protect our children for their entire lives, I will do what I can while I can. My children are very inquisitive, and they will no doubt ask who Kelly is. Then I would have to explain your lifestyle to them.

Gene


Gene:

What planet are you living on? Your children are not even 10 years old, and on the off chance that they might ask who Kelly is, the entirety of your explanation can be summed up in that she is my friend. When Ted and Lorie show up, and your children ask the inevitable question of who Lorie is, are you going to go into an involved description of how she is Ted’s live in lover? Will you combine that with a intricate explanation, accompanied by a video of all their favorite sexual positions? Or will you leave it at a simple explanation that they are boyfriend and girlfriend? Is that a safe couple because they are heterosexual? Are they less likely to lead your children into a life of sin?

Stacie


Stacie:

That is slightly different. I would not expose them to the fact that they are living together, nor would mom and dad let them stay together at the house. But as you pointed out, they are heterosexual, and thus it would be no different than any other couple that they meet everyday. You two, on the other hand, embody a lifestyle that is wrong and I will not have you parade your choice in partners in front of my children. No doubt they will encounter homosexual people one day. I will not have it be on Christmas when they are only small children.

Gene


Gene:

The simple idea that you some how find both Kelly and myself to be in any way a danger to your children is deeply offensive to me. I love all my nieces and nephews, and I have done, and will continue to do, anything in my power to help protect them. Being a lesbian is not some illness that you catch by contact or close proximity. One does not wake up one day and decide that today is a good day to be gay. Above and beyond that you are deceiving your self if you think your children are not already exposed to individuals who are gay. Ignorance is not bliss, but in this case it is rather the seeds of bigotry and hate. You are merely perpetuating in your children a need for intolerance of something you do not understand. You are a grown man, and thus fully capable of making your own choices. I will be bringing Kelly with me to mom and dad’s for Christmas. If you choose to keep your children away that is a decision you will make on your own. Do not lay the blame on me for keeping your kids away from their grandparents and aunts and uncles at Christmas. Dilute your self if you wish to, my dear brother, but do not peddle your ignorance and homophobia to me as you try and pass it off as some sort of altruistic need to protect your children.

The irony in all of this is that not two weeks ago I was waxing poetic about the great love and respect I had for you to a friend of mine. In one day you have taken that respect I had for you, and so much more, away. Though I do not get along with your wife, I would never expect you to leave her behind for any function we might attend together. And I actually have good reason to expect a modicum of understanding for all the grief she has perpetuated on myself and our entire family, including yourself. Nonetheless, you have chosen to share your life with her and therefore, I would never even request such a thing.

Kelly and I know that everyone on my side of the family, and many on her side of the family, do not approve of our lifestyle. In spite of that, we have gone to great lengths to make this a nice Christmas for the children. Kelly helped me with the Christmas shopping and encouraged me to get whatever I thought the kids would like. We even got Wanda something, though I am sure that no one has given a thought to getting her anything. It is easy to negate her existence with your intolerance, however, we have not let that stop us from remembering each of your this time of year.

In closing, I wish you all well and I hope to see you all at Christmas.

Stacie


Stacie:

I have heard of your argument with Gene, and I have written in hopes that I can convince you to respect his wishes in this. Christmas is not a time to hash out family disagreements, but rather a time to celebrate the birth of Christ and to enjoy family. You do not have children, so you can not understand the need to protect his children.

Your sister,

Ireine


Ireine:

I am sorry to hear that you are coming down on Gene’s side of this disagreement. As far as this being a time to celebrate Christ, I agree, and there is no need to drag Him through this. Christ taught us to love one another. And if I am not expected to stand up and fight for my partner now, then when? If I did not stand with her now, I would not be able to respect myself. I am not the one who choose this time for this argument. It was your brother who did that. As far as not having children of my own, that does not mean that I can not understand the love and concern one has for children. I love my nieces and nephews, as well. Do you all not consider that fact that there will likely be an explanation necessary if the children stay at home with their other grandparents? I do imagine that Gene will console himself with the knowledge that he is protecting his children from the big bad lesbians, then turn to his children and make up some kind of lie about why they will be unable to come over at Christmas.

Stacie


Stacie:

Think of it this way, Stacie, what if fifteen years from now my Tony comes to a family reunion with his boyfriend? Would you be happy for him, or would you like to turn back the clock and try and stop him from being gay? Think about it now, and be honest with yourself.

Ireine


Ireine:

My one concern for my nephew, and nieces, is that they are happy. If Tony grows up and finds that he is gay, I would be only concerned for the bigotry he would find in the world, not to mention his own family. I would make sure to be there to support him. And the entire idea that I could some how prevent him from being gay is ludicrous. I can no more prevent him from having blue eyes than I could prevent him from whatever his sexuality will be. Any amount of time spent with me or my partner will not predispose him or any other of the children to be gay.

Stacie


Stacie:

You yourself told me that you chose to be gay. Do you not think that being exposed to this lifestyle could make it more permissible for our children to be gay? And you say that you would want to be a support to the children if they were gay, but honestly, I believe that you would be disappointed. The further you allow yourself to sink into this lifestyle, the more you permit yourself to live a life that is all together wrong. Living a gay lifestyle is living without God, and in that you cannot be happy. Just think, each time we talk or write, you are always unhappy about something. If you were walking in the light, you would once again be able to be happy as you were when you were younger.

Ireine


Ireine:

I am happy in my life, though I could do with a little less hypocrisy and discrimination from others, most especially my family. You will note that often when we talk you also have concerns in your life that make you unhappy. A bassinet you have to relinquish to your cousin, a birthday that your husband did not pay enough attention to you, and the list could go on. That is not to say that you are necessarily unhappy in life, but that something has upset you at the time.

As far as me saying I choose to be gay, you should truly listen to my words, and meaning, and not to what you want to hear me say that would fit in with your own belief system. What I have said in the past is that I could have chosen to live a straight life, but that would have been a life lived as a lie. I am attracted to women. That is the fact of it. I do not desire to be intimate with men, and if I were to live this lie that you all want so desperately for me, then I would live a life alone. However, I do not choose to deprive myself of love because my family is uncomfortable with my life. This is not something I woke up to one morning, but rather something that has been with me for as long as I can remember. Something I did not understand because I was always kept at a distance from anything like it as a child, and taught that whatever this homosexual thing was, it was evil. I attribute a good portion of the demise of my first relationship to the bigotry that was ingrained in me as a young child. Perhaps one day either you or Gene can take solace in the knowledge that you may be able to sabotage a few relationships of your own children in the future due to taught intolerance.

Stacie


Gene:

I am neither conceding defeat, or agreeing with your ignorant views, but rather I do not wish to fight any longer over this. Christmas is my favorite holiday. The opportunity to see family, and give gifts to the children while enjoying how happy it makes them, as well as remembering the greatest gift that Christ gave. I will exchange gifts with Ruth, James, mom, and dad on Christmas eve, and I will not be attending Christmas with the family. I have no desire to see you, or to sour my Christmas any more then it all ready has been. So, Christmas can be "safe" for your family now. Let me for warn you, however, that I will be bringing my partner with me to family functions when I am able to come. Now you will be able to safely bring or leave your children without bothering me any longer. I can see what should have been apparent to me at first that nothing I can say or do will change your mind. Your ignorance in regard to my life is too deeply ingrained in you to change over my words. Know this as well, brother, as you have chosen to protect your children, I have chosen to protect myself, and my partner. In that, I mean that neither you nor your wife are welcome at my house until you have found it in your heart to change your thinking and apologize for your words. I am not a danger to you or your family, but you are a danger to me and mine. It is ignorance and bigotry that leads to hate and indifference, and that often leads to violence. I do not imagine that you will be beating a path to my door, but in case the thought occurred to you, think again.

Your sister,

Stacie


Stacie:

I am not ignorant, nor am I a bigot. Ignorance infers that one is uneducated, or unaware. A bigot is one who holds blindly to a belief. What you do is wrong, and because of that I can not allow my children to be exposed to your lifestyle. I am sorry you have lost respect for me, and I am sorry that you are upset, but my children are more important to me then any discomfort either you or I may have to feel. Merry Christmas. Be safe, and well.

Gene


Gene:

You are too generous, Gene. Wishing me a Merry Christmas and what not. I have only recently come to find out that Mary and her four girls were there at mom and dad’s for Christmas. I have not seen the girls in over two years, being as they are now living in Alaska. I would have loved to see them. You not only took away my chance to see your children, but also the chance to see my other nieces. Consider this: you are depriving not only me, but also the children from the love that I could show them as their aunt.

As for my description, and terminology of your personality, I, too, have a dictionary, and I am not ignorant of the definitions of the words I used. I say it again. You are ignorant of a lifestyle you do not understand and bigoted in the belief that you hold to. Blindly intolerant or my life. In your own words, you exemplify the definition of a bigot.

As for your apology, it is a hollow apology. Continue to blind yourself, brother, but peddle your narrow minded ideas in some other direction. I have no time for it. There is enough heat and prejudice out there for me to deal with. I do not need to hear it from you as well.

Stacie

If you have enjoyed Roki Storm's "E-mails At Christmas", then please be certain to e-mail her at  rokistorm[at]hotmail.com  and thank her for posting this Story.

Click here for a list of all of Roki Storm's  Stories and Poetry at  Sapphic Voices Authoresses.