Sapphic Voices Romance

Imagine That

Chapter One

Jessie wasn’t the best looking “sister” around and she knew it but she felt as though she was a pretty fair looking butch. Better looking than some of the sisters at the plant she worked at. Out of the 700 people working there, she knew at least 25 who were gay. The company didn’t care if they were gay or not as long as they did their jobs. In fact, the gays seemed to do a lot better job than the straights, or so Jessie thought. In order for them to get acceptance, they tried harder, it seemed to her.

She had worked there since high school and was well thought of by everyone. Of course, everyone knew about her, that her only lovers were women. But she prided herself in not being like a lot of the gays that worked there, loud, boisterous, cussing like sailors and flaunting her lifestyle in everyone’s face.

For over a year she had been by herself since Linda left her for some young baby butch she met at her workplace. She was okay with it because all the excitement and passion had been gone from their relationship for a long time. Sex was just a necessity not a desire. She had known for a long time that they were drifting apart and just really didn’t care anymore. She knew something was up when Linda started coming home talking about a new employee named Janet every night. It didn’t take long to put 2 and 2 together and realize that 4 was Linda was in love with Janet. She was just glad that by the time it was over, she was no longer in love with Linda. Sure it hurt. But not like it could have.

She hated living alone, hated dinners for one, cold beds and most of all the lack of companionship. She really missed having someone to talk to at night. She had never had many close friends. She was just too bashful for her own good and she knew it. Because of that, it had taken her 6 months to get up the courage to ask Sara, a woman who worked on the line next to her, out on a date. They had talked a lot every day but she knew she was a big chicken shit and hated that part of her personality but didn’t know how to overcome it. She couldn’t believe it when right in the middle of a conversation she asked Sara to go out with her on Saturday night.

“I would love to!” was Sara’s reply.

Jessie was startled by both the question and the reply.

Before she knew it, it was Saturday night and she was as nervous as a whore on the front row pew at the local Baptist Church.

She wasn’t real sure what to do but she thought that her making reservations at Mario’s Italian Restaurant was a good move since Sara loved Italian food. After that, she decided, what they did was up to Sara.

Then she was faced with the problem of what to wear. She didn’t want to go too casual and she didn’t think full blown out Butch was in order so she finally settled on a dressy pair of pleated gray slacks, a pink oxford shirt and a maroon and gray pullover sweater. Instead of the imitation Obsession cologne she wore to work, she pulled out the real stuff to wear. She new that Sara liked it. She was always telling her how nice she smelled even if it was the generic stuff.

After she put the finishing touches on her hair, she paced the floor until time to leave. She didn’t want to be too early for fear of seeming too anxious, which she was and didn’t want to be late seeming to not care enough to be on time.

Finally it was time to leave. She checked herself in the full length mirror for about the twentieth time and said to herself in the mirror, “Well, this is as good as you get, kid!” then headed out the door.

It was a 7 minute drive to Sara’s and she was still 10 minutes early so she sat in her car listening to some music for a few minutes. At exactly 7:30pm she knocked on the door to her apartment. Immediately the door came open as if Sara had been watching her walk up to it.

“Hi Jessie! Come on in.” Sara said almost bubbly.

She smiled and walked in. She looked around the small apartment in amazement. She couldn’t put her finger on what particular style Sara was going after. The only thing that came to mind was Feminine and Dainty. It was like an article out of Better Homes and Gardens titled “The perfect apartment for young ladies”.

“Sit down. Make yourself at home.” Sara told her.

“Thanks. This is a really nice apartment.”

“Thank you. Somebody told me one time that a woman’s home reflected her inner soul. What would you say this place says about the inner me?” Sara asked her.

“Gosh, I don’t know! Is this a trick question?” Jessie asked.

“No silly! I just wonder how you see me.”

“I see a quiet, sensitive, sincere, beautiful lady with a lot of sadness in her eyes.” Jessie told her sheepishly.

“My apartment tells you that about me?”

“No, my mind and eyes do.”

“What do you mean, “sadness”?

“I don’t know. There just seems to be something missing in your life and it shows in your eyes.” Jessie quietly told her.

“I don’t know why you see that. I am happy. I make good money. I have a nice car almost paid for. I have what I think is a nice apartment. I don’t go hungry and I have an almost completely new wardrobe. What more could I ask for?” Sara told her mildly defensive.

“A friend and lover!” Jessie blurted out before she could catch herself.

“I have a friend. I have you. And I’m not sure if I will ever have a lover again. I don’t like the pain involved when you lose one.” Sara told her.

Jessie wanted so bad to say, “I will be your lover. I won’t hurt you.” But all she would let herself say was, “Yes, I am your friend.”

Sara wanting to change the subject asked her, “Would you like a drink? I don’t drink much myself but I always keep it on hand in case anyone wants something.”

“No thanks. We need to get going. I made reservations at Mario’s for 8:15 tonight and we need to get going or we will be late.”

Jessie helped her on with her coat and caught a faint whiff of Enjoli perfume.

“Wow! You smell fantastic. I love Enjoli.” She told Sara.

“I know! That’s why I am wearing it.” Sara told her with a mischievous smile.

Arm in arm they walked to Jessie’s car. She unlocked and held the door open for her then closed it after she got in then walked around to the driver’s side, got in and hooked her seat belt in one smooth movement.

“My, what a gentleman! It is good to see that chivalry isn’t dead even in our lifestyle.” Sara told her.

“I believe in treating a lady like a lady. I think that is something that should never go out of style.” Jessie bashfully told her.

During the ride to Mario’s they sat quietly listening to the radio. There was valet parking there so Jessie didn’t get the chance to hold the car door for her then. The valet helped Sara out. They knew Jessie so they knew she would let herself out and give them a hassle if they offered to open her door. She had known the owner, Mario, and his lover since before they opened the restaurant and even gave them the idea to make each booth as private as possible since they would have straight and gay clientele that might need the privacy. She knew there had been many gay and lesbian relationships that got a good start from their dinners there. The boys had created the perfect romantic atmosphere with good food, good wine and a lot of discretion for ALL of their customers.

Jessie had only taken 2 other ex lovers there. That was a special place to her and reserved for special women and she knew that Sara was the most special of all she had taken there.

As expected, the food was wonderful and the wine was superb. Jessie knew nothing about fine wine so she let Mario pick that for them. Sara was very pleased with it and that made Jessie feel a little more relaxed. The conversation during dinner stayed light and carefree. As the evening wore on Jessie became totally relaxed with this beautiful sad eyed woman. She soon realized she was beginning to have some very serious feelings towards Sara. She watched the crinkle in the corners of her eyes when she smiled and loved the laugh lines around her mouth that she hadn’t noticed before. She saw the quiet beauty of the way she held herself and heard for the first time the gentleness of her voice.

She mentally wondered what it would be like waking up next to this soft gentle creature every morning. The thought of making love to her wandered into her mind but she pushed that thought back. She didn’t want to start thinking about that. She didn’t want to let things like that cloud her mind when she was having such a good time just enjoying spending time with her. She had thought about that days before. She had fantasized just how sweet her lips were and how soft her neck would be to kiss. She imagined how beautiful and firm her small breasts would be to hold in her hands. She thought she knew the smell of her womanhood as she kissed her body all the way down to the light V of hair that must be protecting the very essence of her womanhood. She had imagined taking her tongue and parting the lips that hid the spot that turned ladies into wanton, lustful, uncontrolled creatures.

Needless to say, Jessie had a very vivid imagination but she knew she couldn’t think about things like that just then. That was for another time and place, like in the privacy of her own bedroom and her own mind.

She thought to herself that she had to keep the evening light and let Sara take them to their next level if there was to be another level.

Suddenly she realized Sara had been talking to her and she hadn’t heard the first word she had said.

“Earth to Jessie! Are you still with me?” Sara asked quizzically.

“I’m sorry! I guess I stepped out into the ozone a minute.” Jessie told her as her face reddened with embarrassment.

“It was more like 3 minutes. What I was saying was, ‘Do you have something in particular you want to do when we leave here or would you like to maybe go rent some movies and take them back to my place and watch them?” Sara told her.

“Well, I figured I would leave that up to you. You said you didn’t care much for the bar scene which is fine with me. I’m kinda bored with the bars myself. We can do whatever you want to do.” Jessie said.

“Does renting some movies and going to my place sound ok to you?”

“That is fine with me. We can go to Blockbuster, then stop and get some munchies and if you don’t mind, I could pick me up some beer. I love movies, munchies and beer.” Jessie cautiously told her.

“We just need to stop at Blockbuster. I got the munchies and you some beer this afternoon on my way home from running some errands. I would have gotten some movies too, but I don’t know what kind you like.” Sara proudly told her.

“Why did you do that?” she quizzically asked.

“Because I wanted to. Anyway, what kind of hostess would I be if I couldn’t offer my guests what they wanted? But we will have to rent more than one or two movies.” Sara told her with a smile.

“How long do you plan on me staying?” Jessie asked with surprise.

“All night!” Sara told her with her mischievous smile broadening across her face.

Jessie was in total shock from that statement. For one of the few times in her life she was absolutely speechless.

“Did I say something wrong?” Sara asked with concern in her voice.

“No! Nothing wrong. You just caught me a little off guard.” Jessie stammered.

“You don’t have to stay all night. You can leave whenever you want to.” Sara sadly said.

“Why don’t we just rent a couple of movies? We might get tired of watching movies and I would hate to see a good film go to waste.” Jessie cautiously told her.

“Whatever you think best.” Sara told her.

Jessie motioned the waiter over to get their check for them. He told her their check had already been taken care of. Mario had torn it up.

Jessie got up looking around for Mario and spotted him and his lover at the front grinning like two Cheshire cats and giving her the “thumbs up” sign so she nodded her thanks and sat back down.

“What is going on?” Sara asked.

“It seems Mario took care of the check. It seems he approves of you.”

“Well, that was really sweet of him. I would like to meet him and thank him…….for the dinner and the approval.” Sara told her.

“Whatever you say m’lady.” Jessie told her bowing to let her pass.

“Hey, what’s the big idea? Can’t a butch impress a girl around here by splurging for a good meal?” Jessie asked jokingly.

“Actually, it has been so long since we saw you smile that much that it was worth it to us to buy you a meal. And might we ask the name of this gorgeous woman who seems to have you wrapped around her little finger so tightly?” Jim, Mario’s lover asked in his very fake Italian accent.

“I guess I can tell you since I don’t have to worry about either one of you stealing her away.” Jessie happily told them.

“Ah! But such a beauty, only a real man could possess.” Jim carried on.

“Ah! But You would want the real man so I have nothing to worry about.” Jessie said poking him in the side.

“So true! So true!” Jim said.

“Anyway, I don’t possess her and never will.” Jessie said getting a look of surprise from all three.

“I mean, no matter what, she will always be her own person. And if you must know, this is Sara Brooks. We work together. Anyway, give me a break fellas. This is our first date and if she thinks all my friends are like you 2, it will be my last.” Jessie said.

“Well, I guess, Little Lady, this is the last date you have with our little buddy here. See, we are the only friends she has.” Jim told Sara in his slow Texas drawl.

“That’s not true. You aren’t my only friends, just my best friends.” Jessie confided.

“You mean somebody else likes you and can put up with your sorry ass like we do?” Jim asked, smiling the whole time.

“As a matter of fact, I happen to think Jessie is very nice. And she does know how to treat a lady.” Sara said smiling in defense of Jessie.

“Whoa little lady! Please don’t bite me.” Jim begged playfully as he fell to his knees with his hands clasped in front of him.

“I like her! She’s like a Venetian Fly Trap. Beautiful to look at but don’t get too close. It could be hazardous to your health.” Mario submitted faking fear.

“That’s enough fellas! We have to go.” Jessie told them.

“Why the hurry? If you could wait around a little while we close up, we could all go get a drink and get to know each other better.” Jim offered.

“Sorry, but we already have plans for the rest of the evening.” Jessie told them.

“I just bet you do!” replied Mario.

“Actually, we are gonna go rent some movies and go back to my place.” Sara offered.

“Pornos? How wonderful!” Jim added.

“Of course, pornos. That’s all I ever watch.” Jessie added as she noticed Sara pale slightly.

“I am just kidding, Sara. I never watch those things! I don’t have the courage to walk up to the cashier to pay for them. I would be way too embarrassed.” Jessie quickly added.

“You scared me for a minute.” Sara admitted.

“Are you sure we can’t talk you into sticking around a little while?” Mario asked.

“Not tonight but how about if we take a raincheck on that?” Jessie said.

“What about tomorrow night? We are out of here by 8:00pm on Sundays.” Mario asked.

“I’ll call you tomorrow one way or the other. Let us just get through tonight. By tomorrow, this lady might hate my juts.” Jessie submitted.

“Let’s leave them alone, Mario. This is their first night together.” Jim added.

“Our first date!” Jessie corrected.

They said their good-byes with the agreement that Jessie would call them the next day. As before Jessie opened and held the car door for Sara. She was proud that somewhere along the way she had picked up some good manners.

Sara paused a moment looking into Jessie’s gray eyes thinking how much she would like to kiss her right then and there. Jessie seemed to see in Sara’s eyes what she wanted because she wanted the same thing but they both realized this was not the time or place. For a few moments they were frozen in time and space and lost in each other’s eyes. Suddenly Jessie felt a shudder rack her from head to toe and she broke the eye contact. She wanted to kiss her so badly but the parking lot was well lit and there were still customers walking around so instead she just gave her hand a squeeze and motioned her into the car.

The drive to the Blockbuster was done in silence but at one point Sara reached over and took Jessie’s hand off the shifter and held it in her lap. They exchanged knowing smiles and left it at that.

At the video store they found they both liked SciFi, Horror, comedy, action/adventure movies and good love stories so they settled on Men In Black II and Jessie talked Sara into “Desert Hearts” without remembering about the explicit lovemaking scenes in it. Sara had never seen any Lesbian based movies and she had heard of that one so she agreed.

It seemed to Jessie that nothing had to be said between them. They just rode back to Sara’s apartment holding hands and smiling.

Jessie wondered if this could be the woman she had dreamed so many times of sharing the rest of her life with. She glanced over and it seemed as if a thousand butterflies had been turned loose inside of her when she caught a quick glimpse of the contented look on Sara’s face.

They walked hand in hand into the apartment. Sara turned to close and lock the door. When she turned back around she was face to face with Jessie. Their eyes locked. Jessie put her hands on each side of her waist and pulled her to her kissing her softly at first then deeper and more passionately.

Jessie felt her knees weaken and knew she had to let go or slide to the floor. Slowly she pulled away and for a long time just stood there holding her in her arms until she could feel the blood go back to her feet and she could back up. She finally pulled back and for a long moment their eyes met and they seemed to look into each other’s soul.

Jessie thought Sara had the most beautiful glow about her then she suddenly wondered if it might be anger that caused the flushed glow. After a moment she realized it wasn’t anger and hoped with all her heart that what she was seeing was love pouring out of Sara. She had forgotten until that moment that Sara said she didn’t want another lover because it was too painful. Jessie knew that hurting Sara was the last thing in the world she ever wanted to do. She was afraid that maybe she had overstepped the boundaries and Sara really just wanted her as a friend but when Sara leaned forward and kissed her lightly on the lips, she knew that friendship wasn’t all that was in the cards for them.

Slowly and bashfully Jessie pulled away and for a minute stood awkwardly not knowing exactly what to say or do but stand there like an idiot.

Finally Sara broke the silence saying, “Well, that was nice! Very Nice!”

“I’m sorry!” Jessie stammered. “I don’t know what came over me. You just looked so beautiful and I couldn’t resist it.”

“There’s no need to apologize. It was inevitable. I was just wondering how long it would take you to kiss me.”

“I’m a little slow on the draw when it comes to things like this.” Jessie told her turning to go sit down in the living room.”

“You didn’t seem all that slow. It was actually your first real opportunity all evening and you took it.” Sara told her going over to turn on the TV and DVD player.

They watched MIB II first sitting together on the couch then put in Desert Hearts. Suddenly Jessie remembered the scene later and the movie and suggested they watch it some other time.

“Why don’t we watch that some other time” Jessie suggested.

“Why? Have you seen it before?”

“Yes and I just remembered a part of it you might not want to watch with me right now.” Jessie told her.

“Why?”

“It has some pretty heavy duty stuff between two women late in the movie.” Jessie admitted.

“Maybe I can get some pointers then.” Sara told her.

“If you make love as well as you kiss, I don’t think you need any pointers.” Jessie shyly told her.

“I imagine you will find that out soon enough.” Sara told her quietly.

“I thought you said you just wanted a friend and didn’t want another lover in your life?” Jessie said.

“I DO want you to be my friend first of all but I don’t think it would be too bad to have you as a lover also. Do you think it is possible for people to be friends and lovers?” Sara honestly asked.

“I do think so but too many people get involved sexually before they ever get to know each other and then usually the chance of being friends is already out the window. People put too much stock in sex holding a relationship together. Some people base their whole relationship on great sex instead of great friendship.” Jessie told her thinking about some of her own past relationships.

“I don’t see how so many people just have casual sex and not even know anything about their partner. They could be serial killers, child molesters or God knows what.” Sara said.

“Tell me something.” Jessie said getting up to get another beer.

“Where are you going?” Sara asked, getting up also.

“I am just getting another beer.”

“Just sit back down. I will get it. Do you want anything else?”

“No thanks,just a beer.”

There are lots of things I want but my life just hasn’t offered me the opportunities to get all that I want.” Jessie told her sadly.

“What do you want?” Sara asked handing her the beer.

“That’s a big question. Where do I start?” Jessie said.

“Start with what you want most of all.”

“I want to find that special someone to spend the rest of my life with. I know I’m not perfect and never will be but I want to find that person that will love me just as much for my misgivings as my gifts. I know I am capable of loving someone with all my heart, body and soul. I just want to find someone who can love me the same way. And I want her to be my best friend in the whole world. Then I want world peace!” Jessie added with a laugh.

“The first part is reasonable but I don’t know if I can help you with that last part. I think I can help you with that first part. We have already become friends. I know a lot of your faults just like you know a lot of mine and I already like you…..A lot!” Sara told her taking her hand in hers.

“So you think you can be that special woman in my life? Do you think I can be that for you also?” Jessie asked staring into Sara’s gray eyes.

“If I didn’t, we wouldn’t be having this conversation. I have wanted to get you in my life for a long time. I just never knew how. I was so excited when you asked me out I nearly danced down the production line.” Sara told her.

“You never seemed that interested in me.” Jessie told her.

“I didn’t want to seem too anxious but I have had my eyes on you for a long time.” Sara told her honestly.

“Imagine that!” Jessie said pondering over what she had just been told.

Finally she said, ”I don’t want to rush this and ruin everything. I don’t want sex to be the basis for our relationship. Maybe I should just go and let you think this over more and see how things look in the daylight.”

“If you think that’s what you should do, then that’s what you should do. But the daylight isn’t going to make any difference in how I feel about you. You forget, I have already seen you in the daylight and I liked what I saw then as well as by this candlelight. The sun rising tomorrow or rather later this morning isn’t going to make any difference. I know what I want and I want you.” Sara admitted.

“You need to make sure that what you are saying is what you really want. I don’t fall in love easily and I fall deeply when I do. I have spent my life dreaming of someone like you. I don’t know what I have done to deserve this. Before it goes any further, PLEASE make sure this is for REAL and not just for NOW. I can’t take another big hurt right now.” Jessie admitted to her.

“I have no intention of ever hurting you, Jessie. I want to wake up every morning next to you and feel your arms around me every night when we go to sleep, for the rest of my life.” Sara told her snuggling into her arms.

“Well, where do we go from here?” Jessie asked with all she had heard tumbling through her head.

“How about we sleep on it? Come to bed with me and just hold me. That’s all I want tonight. Just to feel your arms around me, holding me while I go to sleep and wake up next to you in the morning.” Sara told her.

“You really think I can do that? Just hold you and nothing else?” Jessie asked confused.

“Yes, I do. I think you have enough respect for us that you can do that.” Sara admitted.

“You sure are asking a lot of me.” Jessie said.

“It’s not too much considering it could be the determining factor in whether we spend a lifetime together or just a night.” Sara told her.

“You strike a hard bargain, Lady.” Jessie admitted.

“Successful investments come from hard bargaining.” Sara told her, smiling.

“What if I don’t pass the test tonight?” Jessie asked.

“What if I don’t?” Sara smiled and said.

If you have enjoyed C.Y. Watkins' "Imagine That - Chapter One", then please be certain to  Contact The Writer  and thank her for posting this Story.

Click here for a list of all of C.Y. Watkins'  Stories and Poetry at  Sapphic Voices Authoresses.